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Showing posts with label Aksinya. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Aksinya. Show all posts

Monday, June 17, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, Revelation and The End

17 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, Revelation and The End

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

When you complete a novel, you need some sense of completion.  I didn't feel that the end at the second climax of Aksinya was sufficient.  That's why I added this last scene.  I wanted to give the reader a completion of Aksinya, Natalya, and Ernst's lives.  This isn't the end, but it certainly completes an entire epoch in their lives.


The door opened a crack, “Mrs. Aksinya Andreiovna Lopuhin, please enter.” 

Aksinya stood and entered the office.  The headmistress had her back to Aksinya and walked back to her desk.  The woman seemed young.  Very young for a headmistress.  One shoulder drooped a little lower than the other, but her back was ramrod straight and her clothing was very fine, much finer than Aksinya’s. 

The desk was large and filled one end of the room.  The office was rather deep and had a fireplace on the left wall.  Some padded chairs and a simple tea table were arranged before the fireplace.  An unpadded chair sat before the desk.  Without turning, the headmistress pointed to that chair.  Aksinya stood beside it and waited for the headmistress to sit. 

The moment the headmistress turned, Aksinya dropped her briefcase.  Her mouth fell open.  She couldn’t speak.

The woman before her gave a cry, “Princess Aksinya.”  She rushed around the desk and embraced her. 

Aksinya couldn’t get her breath she couldn’t speak.  Finally, she threw her arms around the headmistress and exclaimed, “Lady Natalya.”

Natalya buried her face in Aksinya’s thick braided hair and blubbered.  They stood together for a long time without saying anything.  Finally, Natalya spoke, “I thought I would never see you again, Princess.”

Aksinya kissed her cheeks, “Dear Lady Natalya, I would never have guessed I would find you here.  Is Herr von Taaffe with you?”

Natalya gave a laugh, “I am Mrs. Natalya Alexandrovna von Taaffe, though not called a Lady anymore.  And you?”

“Father Dobrushin married me although he is not a priest anymore, and I am no longer a Princess.”

Natalya’s moist eyes held Aksinya’s, “You will always be a Princess.  My lady’s maid told me you were looking for a job.”

“Please, Lady Natalya, I’m certain you would not wish to have me around you all the time.  I know I will bring back terrible memories to you.”

“You don’t understand at all Princess.  You are the reason I am here today.  Wait with me for a while.  Let me hear all that has happened to you since we parted, then we will have luncheon with Sister Margarethe, and we will discuss your teaching work in my school.”

“Sister Margarethe is also here?”

“Herr von Taaffe retained her as our housekeeper.  She converted to Russian Orthodox and entered an order in the United States.  Our school is loosely affiliated with Saint John’s.”  Natalya held Aksinya at arms length and looked her over, “Dear friend, we have so much to talk about and so much to share.  I do love you, Princess.  I want you to remain with us forever.”

“In spite of everything that happened?”
“Because of everything that happened before.  That time marked the end of a horrible and wonderful period, yet redemption came to you, to me.”  She held Aksinya close, “I could not bear to lose you again, Aksinya.  You redeemed me, the first of many.  You shall redeem many more.  God exceeded our expectations in spite of what we had done.” 

So, we learn what happened to Natalya.  We learned what happened to Ernst.  We learned what will happen to Aksinya--she will find a job with her friend, Natalya, and with Sister Margarethe.  The reader realizes that this isn't the end of the whole tale.  It is certainly the end of the novel--it isn't the end of the lives of the characters.  There is no purpose in continuing the story because the plot and theme have been played out.  They have run their course.  Finally, the reader gets a statement of the theme of the novel.  This is the last paragraph.  Most authors don't give you such a clear statement of the theme--I thought it was important here.  Notice, it is provided by the conversation of a secondary character.

The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.


Sunday, June 16, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, It Worked

16 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, It Worked

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

This is a pure release with a second tension builder and an implied plot and theme continuance.  The novel will end before we absolutely know what will happen to Aksinya.  This is an implication.


After a few minutes, Stacy exited the office.  She held her features set in a look of contrition.  The moment the door closed, she gave a very American, thumbs up to Aksinya, and mouthed, “It worked.”  Then louder she said, “I hope you do teach here.”  She skipped back down the hall to her class.

Stacy tried what Aksinya told her--it worked.  We don't see the event, but rather the result of it.  This is an advanced technique in writing.  The release is the success of Stacy in reducing her punishment.  The tension builder and the implied information is the statement "I hope you do teach here."  The point is that Aksinya has already made a friend and that bodes well for the future and for Aksinya's maturing as a person.  The tension builder is that Stacy's statement brings us back to the purpose for Aksinya being at the school to begin with--she's looking for a job.
 
The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.

Saturday, June 15, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, Stacy

15 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, Stacy

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

I set the characters through conversation.  The obvious purpose is to supply more information about the school and to provide a tension and release prior to the main portion of the scene.  This is a great example of how conversation can be used to inform the reader and describe important settings.


The girl beside her stared at Aksinya.

Aksinya stared back, “I’m Aksinya Andreiovna Lopuhin, and you are?”

The girl answered, “I’m Anastasiya, but everyone calls me Stacy.”  Her Russian was from Moscow, but the name Stacy was said purely in English.

Aksinya laughed, “Do you speak English?”

“Not well.  We’re supposed to learn it here.”

“Are you?”

“Too well.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“My brother taught me some words and the Sister didn’t like me to say them at all.”

“What were the words?”

Stacy motioned for Aksinya to lower her head a little and whispered into her ear.

Aksinya blushed, “Is that why you are here to speak to the headmistress?”

Stacy nodded woefully.

“You have a Nun teaching here?”

“Yes, she is Orthodox but not from Russia.”

“What does she teach?”

“English, German, and French, but mostly German.”

“I see.”

The girl, Stacy asked, “Are you going to go to school here?  Where are your mother and father?”

Aksinya laughed, “I’m applying to be a teacher here.”

The girl’s eyes widened, “You look so young.”

“I’m married,” Aksinya held out her right hand.

Stacy admired Aksinya’s plain golden ring, “Mother told me they married young in the old country.  Just how old are you?”

Aksinya laughed again, “I’m twenty-three.  I just graduated from Radcliffe.”

“Do you like school that much?”

“Yes, I like it very much.  I never was able to go when I was young.”

“You’d hate it if you were my age.”

“Why is that?”

Stacy held out her red hand, “Sister already used her ruler on my hand, and now I have to speak to the headmistress.  If she tells my mother, I’ll get the strap for sure.”

“Perhaps you should tell the headmistress you didn’t know what the words meant and beg her forgiveness.”

“I truly didn’t know what the words were, and I still don’t know what they mean.”

“Then tell her that.”

“Sister wouldn’t listen.”

“Sometimes they are like that.”

The door cracked open, and a call came from inside the office.  It was Russian accented English and sounded very pleasant, “Miss Anastasiya please come inside.”  To Aksinya, the voice seemed slightly familiar.

As Stacy passed Aksinya, she whispered in Russian, “Don’t let her voice fool you, she is quite strict.”

Aksinya nodded.


The information that needed to be passed is about the nun and the school and the appearance of Aksinya.  There is another reason and that is to ingratiate Aksinya in the eyes of Stacy.  This doesn't bear directly on the story, but provides an important piece to the plot and theme.  I love novels that when they end, have an implied continuance, and further, that the reader can guess how the story will continue.  This is being set up here.  The readers want Aksinya to be successful in her new life and love.  I provided these clues at the beginning of the chapter.  Here I provide a degree of competence and goodness to Aksinya.  We will see how her advice pans out.
The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.

Friday, June 14, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, The Girl

14 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, The Girl

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

The scene changes location, so we need to set the next part.  This is a description of the interior.  I think that at least this degree of description is necessary for characters and places.  Tertiary characters don't need a great deal of description.  We shall see the setting of the characters tomorrow.  Here is simply the setting for the place.

The building was similar to many of the row houses Aksinya was familiar with in Boston.  The foyer wasn’t large.  It opened to a stairway that led up into the building and a hall that led to the rear.  A parlor was on the right and a classroom on the left.  Aksinya could hear the teacher lecturing through the closed door. 

The maid didn’t lead Aksinya into the parlor or upstairs but rather headed down the hall on the first floor.  They passed a second and a third classroom on the left and right and finally arrived at a large dining room and kitchen.  They were also on the left.  On the right was a door labeled Office of the Headmistress.  The door was closed.  Outside the door sat four hardback chairs in a row.  A girl of about twelve slumped in one of the seats.  She didn’t seem very happy.

The maid turned a stern look at the girl then pointed to the seats.  Aksinya sat next to the girl.  The maid knocked at the office, entered and closed the door behind her.  She exited just a moment later, “The headmistress will call for you in a moment.”

Aksinya answered “Thank you.”
 
In every scene, we need tension and release.  The setup here is first of all Aksinya's meeting with the head mistress.  Second it is her interaction with the girl.  Nothing extraneous to the plot of theme should be in a novel; therefore, you know that the girl's presence is important to convey some degree of knowledge or information.
 
The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.

Thursday, June 13, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, The Bell

13 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, The Bell

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

The scene is set and we allow the characters to act on it.


Aksinya pulled the bell.  After a couple of minutes a matronly woman dressed as a chamber maid answered the door.  She was pleasant looking.  Aksinya smiled and announced in English, “I am Mrs. Aksinya Andreiovna Lopuhin.”

The maid responded in broken English, “This is a Russian academy, are you certain you are at the right place?  We don’t accept married students.”

Aksinya changed to Russian, “I am here to apply for the position of English and linguistics teacher.  You posted it with the Russian exchange office.”

“Yes, so we did.”  The woman frowned and looked Aksinya up and down.

“Is there a problem?”

“None at all.”  The woman’s tone of voice said there was.  “I’ll take you to see the headmistress.  She is also the wife of the owner of this school.”


There is a joke at Aksinya's expense.  This is an advanced means of description.  It is the use of conversation and other character's observation to show the character to the reader.  The point is to get across the idea that Aksinya still looks young and immature.

The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, Aksinya

12 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, Aksinya

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

The scene continues from the point of view (POV) of Aksinya as she considers her life and time.

She and Dobrushin had been in Boston for a little over four years.  They were delightful years.  She already wondered what she would do to seduce him tonight—it had been two days already since the last time.  He was already a partner at the law firm.  Everyone in the firm knew he was married, but Aksinya rarely showed her face there.  Dobrushushka begged off officially because of her schooling.  That was a good thing, she didn’t need notoriety.  She didn’t want her Dobrushushka to lose this job.

Aksinya halted when her counting reached the correct house number and glanced at the building.  She stopped skipping and walked carefully up the stairs in front.  The sign was right beside the door: Sacred Heart of Christ, Russian Orthodox Seminary for Young Women and Girls.”

Aksinya smiled.  That sounded like just the place for her.  All the other schools where she applied to teach mistook her for a student.  None of them had called her back.  She luckily heard about this place from a friend at their Ecclesia.
Remember that Aksinya worried that she didn't look very mature.  Indeed, we find that this has prevented her from getting a job.

The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.








Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, Boston

11 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, Boston

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

I don't like prologues or postscripts for novels.  If you want to add a postscript, I recommend you just tack it on to the end.  This makes it part of the novel.  The point here is to show a big change and set a new scene.  In the previous scene, I already showed you that Dobrushin was planning on going to the United States of America and taking Aksinya with him.  This scene is the get off the stage scene.  In a stage play, you set the stage and let the actors and actresses play their parts.  At the end of the play, you want to wrap everything up and get the actors and actresses off stage--literally or figuratively.

Aksinya swung off the streetcar and skipped down the Union Park in Boston.  She wore a tweed dress and a jaunty tweed cap.  She carried a leather briefcase her Dobrushushka had given her at her graduation only a month before.  It reminded her of the briefcase she owned when she attended Sacré Coeur, but she never remembered carrying that one herself.  She was very proud of this briefcase—it held her diploma in linguistics and teaching from Radcliffe College.  Radcliffe was one of the few woman’s college she could attend since all the Catholic ones excluded her.  She had mostly escaped notoriety, but still she and Dobrushushka attended a very small Russian Orthodox Church near his office. 
Aksinya spotted Saint John the Baptizer Greek Orthodox Church across the street and started counting the buildings down from it.

I move the scene to Boston in the USA.  The exact time isn't necessary, but the assumed time is during the day--not too early or late.  The next detail is the character and her clothing.  The narration moves quickly to fill the reader in about what Aksinya has bee doing.  It also gives the reason for her being in the place and at that time.

The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.









Monday, June 10, 2013

Scenes - Scene Setting, more True Marriage

10 June 2013, Scenes - Scene Setting, more True Marriage

Announcement: My novels Sister of Light and Sister of Darkness are about to be published. I write this blog about 2 months prior to its publication. I just heard that the proofs will be here soon--likely before the end of the week. My publisher also wants to put the entire set of novels based on Aegypt on contract--that's 5 more novels for 8 total. They also want to put my other novels on contract. The release schedule should be one novel every 2 months. I'll keep you updated.

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

Here are my rules of writing:

1. Entertain your readers.
2. Don't confuse your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.

A scene outline is a means of writing a novel where each scene follows the other with a scene input from the previous scene and a scene output that leads to the next scene. The scenes don't necessarily have to follow directly in time and place, however they generally follow the storyline of the protagonist.

A storyline outline is a means of writing a novel where the author develops a scene outline for more than one character and bases the plot on one or more of these storyline scenes. This allows the scenes to focus on more than the protagonist. This is a very difficult means of writing. There is a strong chance of confusing your readers.

Whether you write with a scene outline or a storyline outline, you must properly develop your scenes. All novels are developed from scenes and each scene has a design similar to a novel. Every successful novel has the following basic parts:

1. The beginning
2. The rising action
3. The Climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement

Every scene has these parts:

1. The setting (where, what, who, when, how)
2. The connection (input)
3. The tension development
4. The release
5. The output

There are many approaches to scene setting. That means there are about a million plus ways you can set a scene. The main point is you have to clearly get across the where, when, who, what, and how.

Here is another example of scene setting from the novel, Aksinya. I'm giving you examples from the book so you can see different ways of introducing and writing a scene. In each snippet, you get the scene setting, the tension and release, and the input and output. This isn't true of every example, but the pieces should be there, and I've been trying to identify for you when all the pieces aren't evident. You can use these ideas to guide your own writing. Make sure you set the scene properly, then make everything come to life through the narration and conversation.

A point of marriage is intimacy.  From such intimacy comes children... the entire point of the Orthodox sacrament of marriage--comfort and children.  Children as comfort and blessing.  As I've been writing before, the power in writing comes from conversation.  Conversation drives this entire scene.  The intimacy is almost entirely conveyed through conversation.


“Yes, you may kiss me all you wish.”  Their lips touched. 

“You were much more passionate before.”

“Shall I be passionate again?”

“Yes,” she trembled as she stroked his face, “But I have an important request.”

He tried to make out her face in the dim light, “A request.”

“It’s wet and sticky over here.  Can I sleep on your side of the bed?”

Dobrushin let out a great laugh, “It’s a little damp over here too.”

Aksinya scowled, “What did you do to me?”

“Didn’t you like it?  Wasn’t it what you always desired?”

“Yes, but I didn’t think it would be so messy.”  She pressed herself very close to him, “I want to be on top this time.”

He smiled again and tried not to laugh, “Why?”

“I like to be in control, and the wet place will be on your side and not mine.”  She placed her lips on his and did not remove them.
Aksinya had him twice more and both times she was on top.  They slept very late into the next day. 


Intimacy in marriage is both moral and ethical.  It is the beauty of marriage and humanity.  It becomes even more beautiful when sanctioned by God.  I have mentioned before, one of my theme goals in writing is to present love within marriage.  Most writers today present love outside of marriage and many times intimacy outside of marriage.  To those of us who are moral and ethical, this is both wrong and silly.  I wrote before about sexual tension.  Sexual tension without the outcome of marriage is pretty desolate, but most people who have experienced it know that. 

The following is a question asked by one of my readers. I'm going to address this over time: I am awaiting for you to write a detailed installment on identifying, and targeting your audience, or audiences...ie, multi-layered story, for various audiences...like CS Lewis did. JustTake care, and keep up the writing; I am enjoying it, and learning a lot.

For more information, you can visit my author site www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel, http://www.centurionnovel.com, www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, thefoxshonor, aseasonofhonor.