17 August 2017, Writing - part x223,
Novel Form, Another Example of Building Tension and Release
Announcement: Delay, my new novels can be seen on the internet, but the publisher
has delayed all their fiction output due to the economy. I'll keep you
informed. More information can be found at www.ancientlight.com. Check out my novels--I think you'll really enjoy
them.
Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon.
This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in
installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in
addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel
was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and
tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this
blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.
I'm using this novel as an example
of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll
keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my
writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production
schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.
The four plus one basic rules I
employ when writing:
1. Don't confuse your readers.
2. Entertain your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the
writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.
4a. Show what can be seen, heard, felt, smelled, and tasted on the stage
of the novel.
5. Immerse yourself in the world of your writing.
These are the steps I use to write a
novel including the five discrete parts of a novel:
1.
Design the initial scene
2.
Develop a theme statement (initial
setting, protagonist, protagonist’s helper or antagonist, action statement)
a.
Research as required
b.
Develop the initial setting
c.
Develop the characters
d.
Identify the telic flaw (internal
and external)
3.
Write the initial scene (identify
the output: implied setting, implied characters, implied action movement)
4.
Write the next scene(s) to the
climax (rising action)
5.
Write the climax scene
6.
Write the falling action scene(s)
7.
Write the dénouement scene
I
finished writing my 28th novel, working title, School, potential
title Deirdre: Enchantment and the School. The theme statement is: Sorcha, the abandoned
child of an Unseelie and a human, secretly attends Wycombe Abbey girls’ school
where she meets the problem child Deirdre and is redeemed.
Here is the cover proposal for Deirdre:
Enchantment and the School.
 |
|
Cover
Proposal
|
The most important scene in any
novel is the initial scene, but eventually, you have to move to the rising
action. I continued writing my 29th novel, working title Red Sonja. I finished my 28th novel, working
title School. If you noticed, I started on number 28, but
finished number 29 (in the starting sequence—it’s actually higher than
that). I adjusted the numbering. I do keep everything clear in my
records.
How to begin a novel. Number one thought, we need an entertaining
idea. I usually encapsulate such an idea
with a theme statement. Since I’m
writing a new novel, we need a new theme statement. Here is an initial cut.
For novel 29: Red Sonja, a Soviet spy, infiltrates the
X-plane programs at Edwards AFB as a test pilot’s administrative clerk, learns
about freedom, and is redeemed.
This
is the classical form for writing a successful novel:
1.
Design the initial scene
2.
Develop a theme statement (initial
setting, protagonist, protagonist’s helper or antagonist, action statement)
a.
Research as required
b.
Develop the initial setting
c.
Develop the characters (protagonist,
antagonist, and optionally the protagonist’s helper)
d.
Identify the telic flaw of the
protagonist (internal and external)
3.
Write the initial scene (identify the
output: implied setting, implied characters, implied action movement)
4.
Write the next scene(s) to the
climax (rising action)
5.
Write the climax scene
6.
Write the falling action scene(s)
7.
Write the dénouement scene
The
protagonist and the telic flaw are tied permanently together. The novel plot is completely dependent on the
protagonist and the protagonist’s telic flaw.
They are inseparable. This is
likely the most critical concept about any normal (classical) form novel.
Here
are the parts of a normal (classical) novel:
1.
The Initial scene (identify the
output: implied setting, implied characters, implied action movement)
2.
The Rising action scenes
3.
The Climax scene
4.
The Falling action scene(s)
5.
The Dénouement scene
So,
how do you write a rich and powerful initial scene? Let’s start from a theme statement. Here is an example from my latest novel:
The
theme statement for Deirdre: Enchantment
and the School is: Sorcha, the abandoned child of an Unseelie and a human,
secretly attends Wycombe Abbey girls’ school where she meets the problem child
Deirdre and is redeemed.
Here
is the scene development outline:
1.
Scene input (comes from the previous scene output or is an initial scene)
2.
Write the scene setting (place, time, stuff, and characters)
3.
Imagine the output, creative elements, plot, telic flaw resolution (climax) and
develop the tension and release.
4.
Write the scene using the output and creative elements to build the tension.
5.
Write the release
6.
Write the kicker
If
you have the characters (protagonist, protagonist’s helper, and antagonist),
the initial setting, the telic flaw (from the protagonist), a plot idea, the
theme action, then you are ready to write the initial scene. I would state that since you have a
protagonist, the telic flaw, a plot idea, and the theme action, you have about
everything—what you might be lacking is the tension and release cycle in your scenes.
Here is an example of developing or
building tension and release in a scene.
This example is from Shadow of Darkness
an Ancient Light novel. This is an early scene, but not the initial
scene. I want you to contrast this scene
with the one from yesterday. Yesterday’s
scene was sparse without any added creative elements (setting elements turned
into tension creating elements). In this
example, I want you to notice the use of stuff (setting elements turned into creative
elements) used to create tension and release in the scene.
The girl in this scene is Lumière. She was wounded while she was trying to
escape the Germans and the Russians during the battle for the Reichstag
building. She would have escaped too—except
a German soldier decided to fire an anti-tank weapon at her. She was gravely wounded. At this point in the novel, the point of view
(POV) is Vasily who is based on a real person—a war correspondent assigned to
the Russian Army. Vasily and Efim are
both Soviet Russian Jews. Vasily is the
future writer of the Black Book which documents the Fascists’ actions in the
Holocaust against the Jews and others.
This is just the historical setting.
I should also mention, this scene takes place in the spring of 1945 just
as the war (WWII) is winding down.
Efim drove up to the Fifth Shock Army
headquarters. When the jeep halted,
Vasily grabbed the girl in his arms and started toward the house where the
correspondents stayed. He stopped and
turned part way around, “Get the clerk Klava Kopylova.”
“Why her, Vasily? She’s practically the General’s PPZh, his
campaign wife.”
Vasily started off again, “Just get her,
Efim. She will be able to help.” Vasily took the gasping girl to the open main
room and laid her on his cot. She was
still bleeding. For the first time since
he had taken her off the battlefield, she opened her eyes with some intelligence
in them and stared up at him. Pain
filled her gaze. Her lips trembled and
blood leaked down the side of her face.
At her look Vasily bit his lip. He mopped at the blood with his
handkerchief. He tied her bandages a
little tighter. The girl began to gasp
harder and pant. Vasily stroked her
cheek, “Death won’t be much longer now, child.”
The headquarters clerk Klava ran into
the room. She was a tall busty woman
with an angular face and blond hair. She
put her hand over her mouth, “What did you do, Vasily?”
“I could not let her die out in the
dirt.”
“Is she dying?”
Vasily swallowed past a lump, “I think
she is.”
“You can’t leave her here. Bring her into my room. There is an extra cot.”
Vasily picked up the girl and followed
Klava.
They didn’t have to pass through the
headquarters to get to Klava’s room.
Klava pointed to the extra cot, “Why didn’t you take her to the field
hospital?”
“I did.”
Klava stared expectantly at him.
“They wanted me to leave her with the
dying soldiers.”
“Couldn’t do it? Is she a friend of yours?” Klava pulled off the girl’s shirt and began
pulling off her pants. Vasily backed to
the front of the room and turned away toward them.
“I…we saw her take a hit on the
battlefield in front of the Reichstag.
When I saw her, I couldn’t leave her to die there.”
“She is beautiful. No underthings. She’s likely a German orphan. That or a whore. If she isn’t, she’ll be soon enough—with the
Fifth Shock Army around.”
“Klava after Treblinka, I couldn’t stand
to see another of my people…”
“If you thought she was a Jew…she’s
wearing a rosary.”
Vasily turned part way around. He turned back again, “Could she be a gypsy?”
“Her hair is too clean, and gypsy women
don’t wear men’s clothing.”
“People will do anything to hide from
the Nazi’s.”
“…and the Russian Army.”
“How do her wounds look?”
“Come help me turn her over. Come on Vasily. She’s like your daughter. Give me a hand.”
Vasily came over reluctantly. The girl was beautiful. At least what you could see under the blood
and the bruising. She was not obviously
wounded on the front of her body. He
helped Klava turn the girl over. A chunk
was carved out of her bloody right leg and shrapnel wounds peppered the back of
the other leg and her buttocks. Her
right arm had shrapnel cuts all over it.
Klava and he began washing and bandaging her wounds. Klava looked up from her work, “You know,
this won’t do her any good.”
“Why not?”
“If by the grace of God she survives,
the shrapnel will kill her from the inside out.
I’ve seen it lots of times.”
“Efim thinks she won’t survive anyway.”
“Her breathing isn’t as labored as it
was. She doesn’t seem to have any
punctures through her chest or lungs. I
washed her entire back, and I can’t see any wound there.”
“Is it possible to bleed from your lungs
and survive?”
“She isn’t bleeding much now. What she needs is a doctor.”
Vasily ran his fingers through his hair,
“Do you have any idea where I can find one, Klava?”
“A German doctor, maybe. You might trade him bread or meat.”
“Do you mind if I leave her here with
you.”
“Yes, I do, but you may leave her here
anyway. When she dies, you must remove
her body right away.”
“Can you stay with her until I get
back?”
“No.
I’m on shift now. I need to get
back to work.”
“Can Efim stay with her?”
“If he will.”
“Just give me a moment. I’ll be back in a moment.”
Klava stared disdainfully at her bloody
hands, “Very well, Vasily. Hurry.”
Vasily found Efim. He was waiting impatiently outside the
headquarters, “Vasily, is she dead yet?”
“No, not yet. I need to go find a German doctor to treat
her. You must stay with her while I go.”
Efim raised his hands, “I can’t stay
with her. Her gasping was driving me
crazy. I’m a father, I can’t stand to
hear that.”
“You must, while I find the doctor.”
“I’ll find the doctor. I promise.
You stay with the girl.” Efim ran
off in the direction of their jeep, “I’ll look.”
“Don’t disappoint me, Efim.”
Vasily returned to Klava’s room where
the girl now lay partially on her left side with a sheet and a woolen blanket
covering her. Klava gave Vasily a single
pained look, and the girl a longer one filled with compassion. She left the room.
In
this example, distinct items create tension and release. The first is the girl, Lumière. She gives every appearance of dying. She is not really a person in this
scene. She is a human being, but more
than that, she is a helpless dying girl.
She can’t really communicate. Her
suffering is a direct pity building event.
If you notice, she doesn’t show much emotion—she can’t. The others around her show all kinds of
emotion. This is what I wrote about
before in developing pity in your readers.
There isn’t a whole lot of emotion being shown directly in the scene,
but this scene drives extensive pity in the reader.
The
extra cot in Klava’s room is another thing that drives tension—this gives
mainly release, a place to put the girl.
The girl’s clothing is another tension driver—Klava undresses her. The lack of underclothing becomes a tension
and release developer—it allows the speculation about who the girl is. Vasily is unwilling to look at the naked
girl, at first, then he helps after Klava reminds him, she is like his
daughter. The naked girl drives tension
and then release.
The
Rosary also drives tension and release.
Vasily and Efrim thought Lumière was Jewish, because of her complexion
and hair. Klava notes, the girl is
wearing a Rosary, this drives speculation and some more tension in the scene—will
Vasily abandon the girl when he finds out she isn’t Jewish?
The
most important thing to note is although many of these points are basic to the
history and events, the “things” (setting elements turned into creative elements)
used to drive the entertainment (tension and release) in the scene are what are
important here. Each of the revealed
elements drive this tension and release.
Each of the revealed items drive the entertainment in the scene. The entertainment comes directly out of the
tension and release. None of the items
are necessary, but the scene turns each of them into Chekov’s Guns, each
necessary for the scene. For example,
the Rosary is an element from Lumière’s past and an item that is part of her
being and character. It’s mention is
necessary in context, but the tension it develops is palpable and
powerful. Likewise, the lack of
underclothing and the undressing. The
observation of Lumière’s wounds. These
are necessary in the context of the writing, but more so for the tension they develop
in the scene.
I’ll
mention the last tension development in the scene just to move on. Vasily, Klava, and Efrim all think the girl
will die. This is the way of war—they all
have seen it. There is hope, but little
hope. Klava treated the girl and
casually goes back to her post. There is
still a touch of emotion, hidden emotion, in her advise to get a doctor. This is expressed more than once by Efrim and
Klava—is she dead yet? They all expect
the girl to die. They are all touched by
her desire to live. This drives tension
for the reader (pity) and in the scene.
More
tomorrow.
For more information, you can visit my
author site http://www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites:
http://www.ancientlight.com/
http://www.aegyptnovel.com/
http://www.centurionnovel.com
http://www.thesecondmission.com/
http://www.theendofhonor.com/
http://www.thefoxshonor.com
http://www.aseasonofhonor.com
fiction, theme, plot, story, storyline,
character development, scene, setting, conversation, novel, book, writing,
information, study, marketing, tension, release, creative, idea, logic
http://www.aegyptnovel.com/
http://www.centurionnovel.com
http://www.thesecondmission.com/
http://www.theendofhonor.com/
http://www.thefoxshonor.com
http://www.aseasonofhonor.com
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