A New Novel, Part 193 Don't Let Your Mind Dwell on it
For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.
Aksinya is being comforted by Ekaterina. Matushka Ekaterina asked Aksinya to tell her about her life...
“Why don’t you tell me about yourself?”
“Will that help you to love me?”
“Yes, and it will help me get to know you.”
Aksinya put out her arm and dipped her finger in a small puddle of tea spilled on the table, “My mother hated me.”
Ekaterina rocked Aksinya, “I doubt that very much.”
Aksinya ignored her, “I was her first child and the child of her first husband. He died before I was born. I reminded her too much of him. My adopted father loved me very much. He gave me whatever I wanted, but my mother didn’t give me what she did my younger sister or brother. She knew I loved fine clothes. Mine were always the least in the house. My mother couldn’t give me hand-me-downs, not at first. Her clothing was too elegant, but when my sister grew taller and larger in the…you know, the chest, than me, I received her old clothing. My sister had jewelry. I had nothing. My father gave me the old guest house. It was too unimportant and too ruined for my mother to care. That’s where I found the books on sorcery. I taught myself everything. I learned Latin on my own.”
“On your own?”
“Yes, perfectly. To use sorcery, you must speak the Latin words exactly as they should be spoken. Most can’t do it. I memorized the books on sorcery. Then I could have everything I wanted. At least I could make the appearance of everything I wanted. Much of sorcery is similar to illusion. It shapes the way the world looks. Some of sorcery is like…”
“Hush, Aksinya, Countess…you shouldn’t speak about sorcery. You want to give it up. You shouldn’t let your mind dwell on it.”
“Yes, you’re right, but it has been a part of my life for so long…”
We have been waiting for this moment--the time to learn more about the reticent and secretive Aksinya. Ekaterina asks Aksinya to tell us about herself. Aksinya wishes very much to be accepted and "loved" by Ekaterina. Isn't it interesting that Aksinya doesn't seem to remember how much Sister Margarethe loved her? That kind of love always frightened Aksinya--so it shouldn't surprise us.
Look at the use of description used to cause an intentional pause in the dialog. The interlude develops the tension in the scene. From the next description and conversation, we find Ekaterina still holds Aksinya. She is rocking her like a child.
Aksinya believes her mother hated her. We heard this from her before with Natalya. Ekaterina pooh poohs that Aksinya's mother hated her, then Aksinya gives us some information to chew on. You can look at this statement from Aksinya in two ways. The one is that her mother really did have some animosity toward her--the other is that her mother knew Aksinya had a problem with luxuria and kept it out of her hands. The result of either her mother's wisdom or meanness resulted in Aksinya learning sorcery. It wasn't Aksinya's mother's fault--it was all Aksinya's doing, but there is a lesson here. Aksinya was obviously a child who was not given much attention. The lack of attention drove her to sorcery.
Aksinya begins to go on and on about sorcery that is until Ekaterina pulls her up short. Ekaterina wants to know Aksinya's problems, but she doesn't want Aksinya to dwell in her sin. As I mentioned Ekaterina is very wise. You should get this just through her conversation. Tomorrow, we learn more.