24 November 2015, Writing Ideas
- New Novel, part 593, Accents Styles of Grammar Q and A
Announcement: Delay, my new novels can be seen on the internet, but the publisher
has delayed all their fiction output due to the economy. I'll keep you informed.
More information can be found at www.ancientlight.com. Check out my novels--I think you'll really enjoy
them.
Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon.
This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in
installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in
addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel
was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and
tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this
blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.
I'm using this novel as an example
of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll
keep you informed along the way.
Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my
writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production
schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.
The four plus one basic rules I
employ when writing:
1. Don't confuse your readers.
2. Entertain your readers.
3. Ground your readers in the
writing.
4. Don't show (or tell) everything.
5. Immerse yourself in the world of
your writing.
All novels have five discrete parts:
1. The initial scene (the
beginning)
2. The rising action
3. The climax
4. The falling action
5. The dénouement
The theme statement
of my 26th novel, working title, Shape, is
this: Mrs. Lyons captures a shape-shifting girl in her pantry
and rehabilitates her.
Here is the cover proposal for Escape
from Freedom. Escape is my 25th novel.
The most important scene in any
novel is the initial scene, but eventually, you have to move to the rising
action. I'm on my first editing run-through of Shape.
I'm
an advocate of using the/a scene input/output method to drive the rising
action--in fact, to write any novel.
Scene development:
1. Scene input (easy)
2. Scene output (a little
harder)
3. Scene setting (basic stuff)
4. Creativity (creative
elements of the scene)
5. Tension (development of
creative elements to build excitement)
6. Release (climax of creative
elements)
I can immediately discern three ways
to invoke creativity:
1. Historical extrapolation
2. Technological extrapolation
3. Intellectual
extrapolation
Creativity is like
an extrapolation of what has been. It is a reflection of something
new created with ties to the history, science, and logic (the
intellect). Creativity requires consuming, thinking, and producing.
One of my blog readers posed these questions.
I'll use the next few weeks to answer them.
10. Type of grammar
11. Diction
12. Field of reference or
allusion
13. Tone - how tone is created
through diction, rhythm, sentence construction, sound effects, images created
by similes, syntax/re-arrangement of words in sentence, the inflections of the
silent or spoken voice, etc.
14. Mannerism suggested by
speech
15. Style
16. Distinct manner of writing
or speaking you employ, and why (like Pinter's style includes gaps, silences,
non-sequitors, and fragments while Chekhov's includes 'apparent'
inconclusiveness).
Moving on to 10. 10.
Type of grammar
Here are some examples of the use of
accents in English (dialects of different types of grammar). This first example comes from Essie.
Seasaìdh is Scottish and speaks with a Scottish brogue. Notice that I use the very slightest changes
in grammar and word usage possible to convey this. Notice how it increases just as Claire
describes.
Mrs.
Lyons shook her head, “You should, and you should enjoy yourself while you’re
here. What would you like to do?”
Seasaìdh
rolled her eyes, “I dunna what to do with myself if I’m not cleaning.”
Claire
laughed, “Aunt Seasaìdh always sounds more Scottish when she gets upset.”
Seasaìdh
frowned, “Oh, that’s how you can all tell.”
Then in that vein, here is another
example:
Aunt
Tilly returned her teacup to its saucer, “Essie was abandoned, and I decided to
give her a family and a place to live.
It is as simple as that.”
Into
her tea, Seasaìdh whispered, “It isn’t as simple as that…”
Mrs.
Lyons raised her head, “What did you say, Seasaìdh?”
“Twas
noth’n. I’m happy she is here to help
you. We’ve been worried about you liv’n
alone out here.”
Here is an entirely different
example of such an accent and conversation:
This comes from the yet unpublished Shadow
of Light novel.
Lumière placed
her portfolio and the envelope on his desk.
Mr. Long tore immediately into the envelope. He pulled out the long letter and read it. His eyes widened as he read. After a moment he noted Lumière’s attention
and covered his face with the paper. Mr.
Long took a deep breath, put down the letter, and opened Lumière’s
portfolio. He looked up at her under his
brows, “Your portfolio is very thin for your background. Have you had an opportunity to memorize it?”
“Yes.”
“Most of the ones
I get are all false.” He smiled, but
didn’t look at her. Mr. Long’s smile
widened and widened as he read through the portfolio. Finally Lumière could see all his teeth. He turned his gaze up at her and chewed
thoughtfully at his lips, “You speak French and are a French citizen. You could act as though you are a
secretary. You are an expert in
Chinese—and I mean an expert.” He turned
his head then rolled his eyes back at her, “Can you fake a French accent and do
it twenty-four hours, seven days a week?”
“Y-yes.” Lumière faked a French accent, “I think I
can. It is not how I was trained to
speak.”
“Have you ever
been trained as an agent?”
“A spy, you
mean?”
Mr. Long nodded.
“Honestly?”
“Yes, of course,
honestly.”
“Oui.”
Mr. Long jerked
upright and leaned forward, “Very good, but we don’t use the term ‘spy’ around
here—we say ‘agent.’ That is the
official term.” He put his finger
alongside his nose, “Here is what you will do.
I am going to put you in place as the secretary for Sir Reginald
Bower. He is a lecher and a woman
chaser. He would love to have a
beautiful French secretary.”
Lumière sat up
straight, “Really sir!”
“Continue with
the fake French accent. You are
marvelously beautiful. Didn’t you know?”
“Really Mr. Long
I’m sure I have heard that before, but it is really tedious. What about Sir Reginald being a lecher.”
“You needn’t
worry about that. He is henpecked, his
wife has him on a short lease, and he is attracted to ugly floozies. He just loves to be seen with beautiful
women. You will be the perfect secretary
for him. Now, Sir Reginald is an
important British diplomat to China .” Mr. Long stood up and moved his hands in
response to his words, “You are French.
You speak English just well enough to get along.” He stared at her and raised his brow, “Do you
need to take notes. I never forget. You must not forget. If you break the protocol I give you, you’re
out. Understand?”
“Yes. I understand.
I will not forget.”
“Now listen, you
are beautiful and slightly provocative.”
“I am generally not
intentionally provocative.”
“I said slightly
provocative. You must be very
attractive. You don’t need to act too
bright. I want no suspicion placed on
you from any side. You are a silly
French secretary hired for your looks.”
“I have an
injured leg and I croak like a crow.”
“You are one of
the unfortunate injured during the war.
This will make you more beautiful to some, pathetic to others, and
answer the question of why you aren’t already married to a rich Frenchman.” He gestured at her, “Just keep up that fake
accent. Now, you must not let anyone
know that you are conversant in Chinese.
You are to listen.” He stared at
her again and squinted his eyes.
“I understand.”
“Nice roll
there. Very French sounding.”
“I am French.”
“But you sound so
British. No more, right? And no one gets an inkling that you
understand Chinese, not a word. I insist
that you act the typical French tourist when you interact with the
Chinese. Is this really clear?”
“Oui, Monsieur
Long, that is very clear.”
“You may use bad
grammar, if you desire. Sir Reginald
won’t care a wit if you can write or type or any of those things. You must be able to make good tea and coffee
and shake a drink every now and then…and listen. I most need you mostly to listen.”
Lumière nodded.
“Let me hear that
marvelous French accent.”
“Oui, Monsieur
Long, you are very clear. I understand.”
He smiled, “Now
as to your reporting. You report only to
me. However, you will not send your
reports directly to me. I will provide
you the address and the office symbol of where to transmit all your
communications. You will place them in
an inner envelope with my name on it.
The address and office symbol will be on the outer envelope. Seal both.”
He wrote out on a sheet of paper the current reporting address and
office symbol. “In the case you need to
report and it is an emergency, come directly to me. When you are out of the country, I will
provide you a safety contact.”
“Monsieur Long,
whom do you plan for me to listen to?”
Mr. Long smiled
again, “Well anyone who speaks Chinese, first of all. Any conversations of interest to the British
government, secondly. We are very
concerned about some of our translation staff and translators. We are also concerned that we fully
understand what the Chinese are saying to us and what we are saying to
them. You are an agent and a full field
operative, an agent of MI19. I’m
sorry. I shouldn’t use that title—the
organization. Is this clear?”
“Oui, Monsieur.”
The above example is how I recommend
you handle accents in English—especially, inadvertent accents. Here is a negative example from The Fox’s Honor. My editor was happy, but in retrospect, I don’t
like this. I would handle it different
with what I know now. This is the only
incident or accent in this novel. This
novel is published.
Sir Roger made a personal visit to Baron Herstet, the Emperor’s
spaceport administrator. Three of his
combat soldiers accompanied Roger. Baron
Herstet was a large man of a stern disposition.
When Roger entered the Baron’s office, Herstet simply waved the younger
Falkeep to a seat and continued his viewphone conversation. After five minutes, Roger received an encoded
signal from his elder brother. That
indicated the spaceport was entirely cut off and their fleet had taken the
orbital port. Baron Herstet’s viewer
suddenly went blank.
“Hey, vat’s dat,” snarled the Baron.
He yelled at his secretary, “Get me repair, right now.” When she didn’t respond, he looked at Roger
and seemed to notice him for the first time, “Vell, vat are you smiling about,
young Roger?”
“I’m sorry, my lord Baron, but repair won’t do you any good. My brother George cut off your
communications.”
“Vell it’s about time. I’d hoped
you’d been here yesterday.” The Baron
stood up and proffered his large paw-like hand toward Roger, “I’m a retainer of
Duke Rathenberg. I am at your
service. Tell your vater dat I vill
gladly swear my fealty to him. And dat
he doesn’t have to pay de land’n fees anymore if he gives me back my
communications in de next ten minutes.”
With
a large smile on his face, Roger took the offered hand and clasped it. The Baron gave him back a large smile also,
and with a firm shake released Roger’s hand and turned again to the viewer.
Roger called up his brother on the portable radio. In a few moments, with a crackle of static,
Baron Herstet’s viewer came on.
“Dat’s better,” beamed the Baron, “I don’t dink dis cost us even a
single credit in lost time, but I’ll tell you later ven I can figure the
numbers out myself.” The Baron turned a
rueful eye toward Roger. “Go on. You’ve done vat you needed to do. It’s possibly cost us some money, but vat’s
done is done.”
So much for types of grammar in
English.
More
tomorrow.
For more information, you can visit my author site http://www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites:
For more information, you can visit my author site http://www.ldalford.com/, and my individual novel websites:
http://www.ancientlight.com/
http://www.aegyptnovel.com/
http://www.centurionnovel.com
http://www.thesecondmission.com/
http://www.theendofhonor.com/
http://www.thefoxshonor.com
http://www.aseasonofhonor.com
fiction, theme, plot, story, storyline,
character development, scene, setting, conversation, novel, book, writing,
information, study, marketing, tension, release, creative, idea, logic
http://www.aegyptnovel.com/
http://www.centurionnovel.com
http://www.thesecondmission.com/
http://www.theendofhonor.com/
http://www.thefoxshonor.com
http://www.aseasonofhonor.com
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