A New Novel, Part 161 I am a Temptation

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.



Aksinya is drunk and is dancing with the Graf von Taaffe.  He has an important question and Aksinya's response does not please him.  Still, he has good news for her.  Aksinya is speaking...


“I have not given him my answer yet.”

Graf von Taaffe’s smile widened again, “He told me he would begin to train to take over the business. I think he is completely serious about you.”

“He said as much. He said he loves me.”

“Indeed, he has never, to my knowledge, told a woman that before.”

“That makes me happy. I would have liked to have kissed him a little longer.”

“Why didn’t you?”

Aksinya made a face and an unmistakable gesture of her head toward Natalya.

“Your chaperone. I understand. I would very much like you to accept my son as your husband. You would be very good for him.”

Aksinya raised her eyes to the Graf’s and cocked her head.

“We don’t have many young women, even in the aristocracy, whose presence brightens a room like yours. You are an absolute treasure to the nobility.”

Aksinya smirked.

“You may laugh at me, but you move and act like a princess, and I have seen many princesses. Most of them couldn’t hold a candle to you.”

Aksinya snickered.

“You laugh again?”

“Sir, my face is plain and my body is boyish. I indulge too much, and I…” She continued in a mumble, “I have other faults not so visible.”

“Yet, by walking into a room you captivate it. By simply existing, you capture the attention of everyone around you.”

“If I were not a Countess, I would be nothing.”

The Graf raised her hand to his lips, “If you were a washerwoman, I believe you might have captivated my Ernst. Whatever you did, it ensorcelled his heart, and I can easily see why he is fascinated by you.”

Aksinya pushed back from him, “Temptation. I am a temptation.”

“Yes, you are, and I’m glad your eyes are at least on my Ernst.” The Graf let go of her hand and stepped back. The music ended, “Thank you for the dance, Countess. Even drunk, you are a wonderful partner.” He bowed.

Do you remember the conversation at dinner?  The question on the table (pun there), was Ernst's participation in his father's business.  Aksinya warned that she didn't want Ernst to become dour.  The Graf countered that Ernst needed to become part of the business so he could take care of a family.  Thus, at dinner, the Graf was pressuring Ernst through Aksinya to take on his family's responsibility as a requirement for marriage.  A marriage obviously to Aksinya. 
 
Because Aksinya has not accepted Ernst's proposal, this ruins the Graf's plan to make a responsible man of his son--first through the family business and second through marriage.  However, everything is not lost.  Aksinya has not given her answer.  This allows the Graf to put pressure on Aksinya: "I think he is completely serious about you.”  Ernst is indeed serious about Aksinya--so serious he would do the thing he hated and that would tie him down.  He would become responsible for her sake.  He would basically give up his irresponsible life to marry her.
 
Aksinya gets this.  She finally figures out what it means for Ernst to love her.  He is willing to give up something (in a way, everything) for her.  Thus her confession: “He said as much. He said he loves me.”

The Graf puts more pressure on Aksinya.  He really wants Ernst to marry her.  Ernst told Aksinya that he didn't have much experience with women.  This becomes more evident here--although the Graf could just be ignorant of his son's activities.  We did note that much of Ernst's knowledge seemed to come from Asmodeus.

Look at Aksinya's inadvertent confession:  “That makes me happy. I would have liked to have kissed him a little longer.”  She would only say this while drunk.  Such a statement would be unseemly in the culture and the times.  The Graf plays along.  He is not shocked--perhaps he instructed Ernst in how to propose and tempt Aksinya (more likely the demon, but his response is interesting).

Natalya isn't the only one who is angry, but you knew that--didn't you?  Aksinya is a little miffed at Natalya for ruining her fun.  The Graf gets this.  Natalya was just doing her job.  The Graf likely applauds this.  His point is more poignant; he wants Aksinya to say yes to marriage and: "You would be very good for him.”

This perplexes Aksinya (it should perplex us a little too).  So far we haven't had much positive about Aksinya.  We generally don't see her the way others might see her.  We did get a couple of descriptions of her physically--we know she isn't much to look at.  We do know she has an unusual effect on others, but mostly we ascribe that (like Aksinya) to the fact she is nobility and a countess.  Now, at once, we see Aksinya through the eyes of Ernst and the Graf.  Note, this parallels the opinion of the Freiherr and Freifrau.  Aksinya's personality and her decorum are what set her apart.  It isn't just the fact she is a countess.  She herself is a treasure.

Aksinya's response shows she thinks this is just flattery.  She can't accept this about herself.  She has never imagined herself as a treasure, not in her family, not in her life.  We do see there are great positives about her, but also great negatives.  We wouldn't have called her a treasure either, but we know her better than the Graf.  Still, his flattery isn't all false.  He would not want Aksinya to be part of his family otherwise--we know by this he is telling the absolute truth from his thoughts.

Then there is a foreshadowing.  I know many readers will forget all these wonderful little hints throughout the novel.  That's why I keep giving them to you.  The Graf's statement to Aksinya really sounds like flattery to us:  "You may laugh at me, but you move and act like a princess, and I have seen many princesses. Most of them couldn’t hold a candle to you.”  What if this were true.

Aksinya doesn't dispute him but rather points out her perception of herself and we know this is also true.  Plus, she has other faults not so visible.  Okay, a little theme talk here.  Aksinya is not little miss everyone, but I certainly want everyone who reads this novel to associate themselves to some degree with Aksinya.  Aksinya represents the desire in all of us for power and for control.  She represents desire (the demon represents temptation).  She is in many ways like all of us.  Like most of us, she knows she is not beautiful.  She does not strive at what she should.  She strives at those things she should not.  She loves luxuria (indulgence).  She is like all of us in this.  These are the bad traits that everyone knows they have, and that most admit in secret, but never in public.  Aksinya is like all of us.  She is prideful.  She is tempted and sinful.  She does not work hard at the good.  She...look I could go on and on.  She is just like all of us know we are deep down inside.  She, like everyone has “...faults not so visible.”  We just know all about her faults.  They are hidden deep inside Aksinya, just as they are hidden deep inside most people.  With Aksinya, we get to see the worst side of a person--yet the worst side of a person who really is trying to do the right thing.  Aksinya knows what is right.  She knows what is good.  She just can't reject temptation.  She, however, unlike everyone else, can see the demon she carries with her.  Okay, there was a theme statement that concerns this entire novel.  Did you get that.  Everyone knows they carry around their own personal demon--they just don't really see theirs the way Aksinya can see hers.  That, in a nutshell, is just what the theme of this novel is ultimately about.  The story and plot point to this, but this is a theme concept.  It isn't something an author directly tells you in the writing.  I'll state it in more direct terms: the main theme of this novel is that Aksinya has a demon (just like everyone has a demon), the question is how to remove this demon.  You can take away that a solution Aksinya determines (or discovers), might work for anyone.  But that's the theme--a high level idea encompassed by the story and plot.

Back to the conversation.  Aksinya's reaction to the Graf's flattery: “If I were not a Countess, I would be nothing.” This is the idea pounded into her head by the girls at Sacré Coeur.  She did not think this from before.  She has been affected by others around her (but you knew that). 

The Graf's response is overwrought and ironic, but perhaps true.  Not that the demon of luxuria would have used a washerwoman as his vessel of evil.  The washerwoman idea is a foreshadowing, by the way.  (It will help if you remember in German a putzfrau is a cleaning lady--a kind of washerwoman.)  Look at the words of the Graf.  He has made inroads to Aksinya's thoughts and heart, but then he blows it: "Whatever you did, it ensorcelled his heart...”

Aksinya knows what this means.  She understands too well about sorcery.  She has truly ensorcelled Ernst's heart and she knows it.  She also knows much was the work of Asmodeus and not she herself.  This is certainly not what Aksinya wants, but it is what she desires.  Do you see this difference and how important it is.  Just like everyone, there are wants and desires.  We indulge our wants (that is what we know is right) and gain greatness.  We indulge our desires (that which we know is wrong) and find ashes.  Akinsya rightly sees she is a temptation for Ernst and for his father.

The Graf doesn't understand at all, but how could he.  He does acknowledge Aksinya's state of inebriation.  Tomorrow, preparations for bed.

A New Novel, Part 160 I'm Drunk

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.



Ernst von Taaffe asked Aksinya to marry him--she didn't answer him right away.  Natalya, Aksinya's chaperone, drags her back to the ballroom and the party...

They both returned to the ballroom. Until they entered the rooms Graf von Taaffe’s servants provided them, Natalya did not speak to Aksinya again that evening. She stuck close to Aksinya for the rest of the event. After Ernst rejoined the party, he did not let Aksinya out of his sight. Natalya watched Ernst with frosty eyes.

Aksinya sat beside the large fireplace closest to the dining room and outside the draft that blew constantly through the long room. She drank and stewed. She would not engage anyone in conversation for very long, but that didn’t matter, the party was winding down and the couples were primarily interested in dancing.

Near midnight, Graf von Taaffe stepped to Aksinya’s side, “Countess, would you honor me with this dance?”

“Why not?” Aksinya’s words were only a little slurred. Her Russian accent cut through the German. Aksinya had feigned weariness to fend off the other invitations she received that evening. She wished Ernst would ask her to dance again. She knew she could not beg off this offer from her host. She stood a little shakily.

The Graf took her hand in his and placed his arm around her back. He led her into the waltz, “I didn’t notice your Russian accent before, Countess.”

Aksinya tried unsuccessfully to pronounce her German words as she usually did, “I was not drunk before.”

“Drunk? You seem very steady on your feet for being drunk.”

“I’m used to it. I’m sorry, I should have said, I had drunk too much wine before and not that I was drunk.”

The Graf smiled, “I have happy news for you. I hoped you had as happy news for me.”

“I’m drunk.”

His smile slipped a little, “Yes, I understand.  I didn't see the ring on your finger.  Then your answer to my son was not an affirmative?”

“I have not given him my answer yet.”

Aksinya and Natalya return to the ballroom.  Natalya is obviously very angry.  We are not certain what or who her anger is directed toward.  There is a hint, Natalya watched Ernst with frosty eyes.  Ernst has made Natalya angry, but she seemed angry at Aksinya before.  Just what is bothering her...we shall see eventually.
 
Aksinya finds a warm place.  She is given the most comfortable space in the room.  This was likely the place reserved for the lady of the house.  She drank and stewed.  Aksinya isn't happy either.  So, Ernst isn't happy. Natalya isn't happy.  Aksinya isn't happy.  Is anyone happy?  Aksinya certainly isn't a very pleasant guest either, but we didn't expect her to be--she is a countess.
 
Fortunately, the Graf comes to rescue Aksinya; he asks her to dance.  Aksinya is drunk.  She is so drunk she can't pronounce her German properly.  We find that she wanted to dance with Ernst again, but Ernst was put off by Natalya--not Aksinya.  Aksinya could not turn down an invitation to dance from her host.  She is shaky--she's drunk.
 
The Graf apparently doesn't notice Aksinya is drunk.  His first words: “I didn’t notice your Russian accent before.”  Can you imagine this.  She tries to speak properly.  We aren't certain of her success, but she is out drunk and truth telling Aksinya by this point.  The Graf can't believe she is drunk.  He doesn't seem surprised or upset.  Aksinya makes the situation worse from one standpoint.  Only those who drink a lot can handle alcohol so well.  She tries to correct herself, but she isn't very successful. 
 
The Graf gets to his point: “I have happy news for you. I hoped you had as happy news for me.”  As to the Graf's news, you might guess it, we shall see it tomorrow.  You know the news he wishes to hear from Aksinya.  Her answer is perfect in perspective: “I’m drunk.”   The reason she is drunk, she implies, is the reason she can't give the Graf a happy answer.  The happy answer he expected, of course, was the Aksinya had accepted the ring and Ernst's proposal. 
 
This whole party was put together by the Graf so Ernst could propose.  He brought together his most important friends and retainers just for this very purpose.  Now, the Graf isn't happy either.  But there is still hope--Aksinya hasn't given her answer yet.  Tomorrow, the Graf's happy news.

A New Novel, Part 155 Dance with Me

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.

Aksinya, Natalya, and the Bockmanns are at Ernst Father's estate for a New Years party.  Dinner and dessert are over; now is the time for dancing...

Ernst and his father led the men from the table. Aksinya followed a servant and the ladies to the parlor. The women spoke with Aksinya and that part of the evening was very pleasant to her. After a while, the men returned to the parlor and the Graf led Ernst to Aksinya, “Countess, would you come to the ballroom. I have promised my guests a dance, and I hoped you would dance with my son.”


Aksinya stood and took Ernst’s arm. She was a little wobbly from the wine. She glanced at him, “I would be pleased to dance.”

In the ballroom, the Graf made a motion toward the sting quartet, and they began to play a waltz. Ernst clasped Aksinya’s hand and led her into the dance. He didn’t say anything and didn’t look at Aksinya at first. She asked him, “Are you embarrassed about your father’s comments at dinner?”

Ernst frowned, “Am I that obvious?”

She laughed, “Yes.”

“Do you understand his meaning?”

“Yes, I think I do. This is why you brought me, isn’t it? Your father sees me as a potential candidate for your bride.”

“Yes, it is that obvious?”

“It was that obvious from the beginning.”

“Yes… And what are your feelings?”

“Feelings have little to do with it.”

Ernst stopped cold, “Wha…what do you mean?”

Aksinya pursed her lips, “Everyone is staring.”

Ernst led off again, “Everyone is staring at you.”

“At me?”

“You are absolutely gorgeous in that dress. If you didn’t wish to be stared at, you shouldn’t wear such beautiful clothing. Didn’t you realize?”

Aksinya tossed her head, “Natalya chose my dress. I leave such things to her. If you wished perfection in decorum and dress you should be interested in her.”

“But I am not interested in her. I am interested only in you.”

“Only because of what I am…”

Ernst pulled her a little closer, “This is not the place to speak about such things.”

“Really?”

“Come, we will converse in private.”

Aksinya pressed her lips together again, “Not without my chaperone.”

So the evening continues.  The conversation of dinner has a break due to dessert and after dinner drinks.  I show you this little cultural phenomena and refer to its reasons.  Usually the gentlemen go to smoke after dinner.  They usually have an after dinner drink.  The ladies usually have an after dinner drink and dessert with coffee or tea. 
 
When the men return to the the parlor, it is time to begin the dance.  The Graf is pushing his son into Akinsya's arms--did you expect anything else?  Aksinya is a little tipsy--did you expect anything else?  Aksinya will dance.  Dancing is one of the major civilized pleasures of the time, and this was a period when all educated and refined people knew how to dance.

Aksinya and Ernst begin to dance.  He doesn't speak and Aksinya is a little drunk, so she does not hold her tongue.  The conversation at dinner is the topic.  Ernst is obviously upset about his father's candor.  Ernst is obvious.  Ernst has always worn his thoughts and his emotions on his sleeve.  From the beginning, he hasn't kept any secrets from us or Aksinya.  His love letters are straight forward.  His love is like a puppy dog's. 

What should surprise us is how observant Aksinya has been.  She picked up on everything.  She knew what was going on.  I ask you again, do you think she is a woman in love?  The Graf was just short of inviting Aksinya into the family at dinner.  He invited her to call him by his given name.  He gave her to Ernst to escort.  He sat her in the place of the lady of the house.  He spoke candidly to her about Ernst and his future.  The next step is obvious to everyone but Aksinya.

So Ernst asks Aksinya in a round about manner.  This is not the correct approach with her at all.  He asks: “Yes… And what are your feelings?” (her feelings about marriage to him--that is, about love for him).  Aksinya floors him with her answer: “Feelings have little to do with it.”  You can see all that is happening here.  Ernst has been dropping hints from the beginning of their relationship.  Well, okay, not so much hints as straight out declarations.  He loves her and wants to marry her.  He thought that Aksinya would fall in love with him just as he has fallen in love with her.  He thought that all the preparation would make her fall into his arms.  He thought that even if she didn't love him, he was at least so good a catch that she would just act like she loved him and everything would be well.  That isn't Aksinya.  Plus, Ernst approached Aksinya about sorcery.  He has her book.  This little perversion of the relationship is the problem.

When they stop in the middle of the dance, everyone is staring at them.  Well, duh.  They are the reason for this party.  They are the couple here.  Everyone knows what is going on.  A marriage proposal is in the works.  This is the way things are done.  Aksinya takes the staring for their motionlessness in the middle of the dance floor.  Ernst gives another reason--Aksinya's beauty.  Which is right?  We know Aksinya is not beautiful, but her dress perhaps makes her look stunning.  This is why the perceptions of the characters are untrustworthy--just like real life.  We see the happenings around the characters and have to interpret them for ourselves--just like real life.  By the way, I use an advance writing technique to show you all this.  I don't tell you everyone is staring; I show you through Aksinya and Ernst conversation that everyone is staring.  No description, just dialog.

Ernst response and declaration that Aksinya is "absolutely gorgeous" shows us that he is smitten.  Whether Aksinya is as ugly as she believes is immaterial to Ernst and to his father.  Look as Aksinya's response.  Natalya chose the dress (she likely chose it for Ernst, but Natalya is the reason, not Aksinya).  There is another way of looking at this--we choose our servants to make us look good.  That is their purpose.  There is a foreshadowing here about Natalya.  I won't do anything other than point this out to you right now.

This interaction leads to the point Aksinya has held to all this time.  She doesn't believe Ernst loves her for herself, but only for her sorcery.  That is the reason for her statement.  Aksinya is a little drunk and she is hot for a little confrontation with Ernst.  Ernst and his father put her on the spot at dinner.  She believes everything is a facade and the facade is based not on Ernst's love for her and what she is, but rather on her sorcery and the demon's actions to influence Ernst and perhaps his father. 

Ernst invites Aksinya to have a private conversation.  Of course this can't be allowed.  This action alone likely proves how inexperience Ernst is with women.  He should know this.  On the other hand, if he does know this, they his request is pure induendo.  We will see tomorrow the beginnings of thier private conversation.