Development - Purpose of the First Scene

24 April 2012, Development - Purpose of the First Scene

Introduction: I realized that I need to introduce this blog a little. I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. The working title was Daemon, and this was my 21st novel. Over the last year, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.

Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

If you haven't guessed yet, I've left this up because I plan to use it in the future as we move through development. The steps in making and using a character in a novel are as follows:

1. Development of the character (history, description, personality, etc.)
2. Revelation of the character (within the novel, show don't tell)
      a. Description of the character - introduction
      b. Voice of the character
      c. Continuing revelation by showing

In a classical plot (and in most of my novels) you have a protagonist, an antagonist, and a protagonist's helper. If you develop these three characters for a novel, the plot will naturally fall out of the development of the characters.

The absolute purpose of the first scene/chapter is to convince a reader to buy your novel.  If you can't capture them with the first scene/chapter, they won't read your novel.  Many say you must capture your reader with the first page, sentence, paragraph.  This isn't all there is, but those are good rules to write by too.  If a reader doesn't like the first sentence, they might not read the first paragraph, which means they won't read the rest of the page, etc.  I'll give a reader the benefit of the doubt.  I don't remember the first sentence of almost any novel I've read.  I've read some pretty bad first sentences, and I will say that negative impression stuck with me through the book.  Usually because the writer wasn't very good.

In any case, the focus here must be the first scene.  The reason I keep writing scene/chapter is because, many readers will read the whole chapter in a "Look Inside" feature.  If they "Look Inside" and don't like what they see, they will not continue the novel (they won't buy it).  Therefore, if your first chapter (or the look inside feature) is more than a single scene, you need to make certain the whole chapter showcases your novel.

The big deal is excitement and entertainment.  I mentioned yesterday that Aksinya is an excellent example of a novel where the protagonist and the antagonist are introduced in the first scene.  We'll talk about this tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I'll explain more about tension and first scene development. I'll talk about characteristics that make a bad first scene/chapter eventually.

I'll repeat my published novel websites so you can see more examples: http://www.ldalford.com/, and the individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel.com/, http://www.centurionnovel.com/, http://www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, http://www.thefoxshonor.com/, and http://www.aseasonofhonor.com/.

A New Novel, Part 267 Beyond This Trial, I Have No Purpose at All

28 June 2011, A New Novel, Part 267 Beyond This Trial, I Have No Purpose at All

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.

Aksinya is on trial in Wien, Austria.  Aksinya was deposed and the court took a break.  Aksinya and Father Dobrushin discuss the case.  The presiding judge is preparing to call for the first witness....

“In the seminary, like most universities, we study theology.  Post graduate work is in law, theology, or medicine.  I studied law.  One of the reasons the Orthodox Church sent me here was to help in the legal matters for refugees.”

“I see.”

“There is a further problem that will come up in the court.”

“That is?”

“Your immigration status.”

“Am I not legally here in Austria?”

“You are and you are not.  The red Russians sent a letter to the court requesting they extradite you for the murder of your family.  The extradition is not part of this trial, but will become an issue at sentencing or your release.  The white Russians wish you back to help rally the war effort.  The same issue concerns your sentencing or release.”

Aksinya pouted, “I do not wish to return to Russia.” 

“I understand that.  Where do you wish to go?”

“I don’t know.  Beyond this trial, I have no purpose at all—other than to be rid of the demon.”

“Yes, we shall see about that.”

The spectators began to return to the courtroom.  They hurried to their seats.  Right at the specified time, the judges’ doors opened, and the Lay Judges then the Professional Judges entered the courtroom and took their seats.

Judge Richter shuffled his papers for a moment and made a decision, “We shall hear particulars about the theft of the house and goods first.  Call the owner of the house, Herr Tauber as the first witness.”

 Herr Tauber was an elderly and balding man.  He wore a tight black suit with a split white cravat.  He was thin and nervous.  He sat tall with his buttocks perched primly at the front of the witness chair.

Yesterday, we learned more about Father Dobrushin.  He is a lawyer whose job is to aid Russian refugees from the civil war there.  Father Dobrushin brings up an important matter.  Since he is an expert in immigration law, he is obvious privy to the information and knows what it means.  This is a deliberate foreshadowing.  I am introducing the idea to you.  You realize the worst event that could happen to Aksinya is to be returned to Russia.  In the hands of the red Russians, she will be tortured and murdered.  In the hands of the white Russians, she will face eventual defeat and then torture and death at the hands of the red Russians.  The demon couldn't ask for a worse end.

I remind you about the demon and the contract in the comments Aksinya shares with Father Dobrushin.  When the judges return to the courtroom, the judge has decided to hear the case of fraud first.  I define the first witness to you.  Tomorrow, the first witness testifies.

A New Novel, Part 136 You have so Little Purpose

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a wondrous sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Wien, Austria.

Ernst has taken Aksinya to the Palais Coburg Hotel for dinner.  They are in the Red Room, a very exclusive place in the very exclusive Palais Coburg.  Ernst has asked Aksinya to call him by his first name.  Aksinya remains in command of the conversation and addresses Ernst...


“In any case, Ernst, am I to understand that you didn’t participate in the war?”


“Ah, but I did, Countess. I marched off with the first wave and served honorably until my father caught me. At his insistence, the Army sent me back and assigned me as an adjutant to a General in Wien. I would still be there except for the end of the war and the reduction of the military. They didn’t need a half Graf who was a lieutenant at full pay. So I am back to my old habits.”

“And what are those?”

“In general, I read. I study Latin. You understand why. I go to breakfast, luncheon, and dinner at my favorite restaurants in Wien. I visit my friends and my father’s friends. It is a pleasant existence.”

Aksinya pressed her lips together again.

“You disapprove?”

“A nobleman should be about a nobleman’s business…”

“And what is that?”

“Managing his estate. Keeping his horses and property. What about your people? Who holds court over them and judges their problems?”

Ernst laughed, “The aristocracy in Austria is much different than you imagine. My estate is not made up of lands and people. Although my father does have some property, and I keep a house here in town, our family’s wealth is in stocks and bonds. We hold industrial agreements and own factories.”

“And your people?”

“No one looks to us.”

“That is sad, you have so little purpose.”

The waiters poured them another glass of wine. This was just a little sweeter than the last. They removed the plates and utensils and exchanged them for a spoon and a small bowl of soup. The size of the spoon was petite and matched to the size of Aksinya’s mouth. She was very pleased with it. The soup pleased her as well. It was a buttery consume of some kind of squash and little bits of bacon. The wine matched it well.

You can count on Aksinya to pounce on the very singular issue that might be a problem in Ernst's life.  She choses the subject that no one will speak of here in Austria right now--the war.  Austria lost the war.  Austria is in ruins because of the war.  The war took food from the people and life from the society.  No one speaks about the war, and Aksinya knows this.  She wants to know about Ernst.  This is her way of testing the man.  She finds out that he was an officer.  She also discovers what he does for a living--nothing.  He is absolutely useless.  That really angers her, but she is willing to let it slip--for now.  She does admonish him.  That is when we learn about the shape of the Austrian nobility.  It is very different than the nobility Aksinya is used to.  She can only judge based on what she knows.  Her judgement is very harsh because she disapproves of Ernst's casual approach to his life.  All of this conversation per their culture is couched in gentle terms and gentleness. 

Still, now we know a lot about Ernst.  We know he fought in the war.  He is not a coward.  He is a wealthy man who doesn't desire to work.  He doesn't hold his nobility as very important.  Aksinya wants more, but she is happy with her luxuria for right now.  In the transition, we get a serving of the soup with more wine.  Tommorrow, Ernst grills Aksinya.

A New Novel, Part 73 Choose the Evil You Will Do

Asmodeus gave us the strongest statement of his purpose so far.  His job is to do evil for Aksinya.  Her response follows.

Aksinya’s eyes darted from one side of the room to the other, “But I don’t want to do any of that.”


“So long as you accomplish evil, I will be pleased. Choose the evil you will do, and do it well. I only remark the evil that will occur if you fail at your part of the bargain.”

“I made no such bargain. I contracted you to be my servant. That was our agreement.”

“There you are wrong, Countess. You contracted to me using a part of your body as a surety. The contract was to me, the demon Asmodeus. I agreed to do your evil work in the world. That is our agreement—to do your evil work in the world. Since you have chosen to have no plan to pursue evil, I am providing one for you. I am happy to do it. I must confess, I was very pleased with how our relationship started. I am not as delighted with how it has progressed.”

“I hate you, demon. God will surely punish you for every way you torment me.”

“God will surely punish you, Countess, because all the evil I do is in your name. In fact, I myself commit no sins—it is you who sin. I am simply a tempter.”

“Get out. Get out of my room and torment me no more.”

“I will leave you for now. You understand what you must do, Countess.” Asmodeus slipped off the bed. He backed to the door and out of the room.

Aksinya waited a few minutes before she moved. Then she ran to her door and yanked it open. The demon was gone. She took a deep breath and leaned against the jam for a while. Then she closed her eyes and mouthed a prayer. She crossed herself. That small action hurt her heart. She couldn’t hold back a whimper and glanced around. She was afraid she would hear the demon’s laughter come out of the close darkness.

After a little, Aksinya closed her books and went to Natalya’s room. She didn’t even finish the work she was supposed to do. With Natalya, she reviewed her lady-in-waiting’s German work and spoke German with her for an hour. Then she went to bed.

If you didn't understand the demon's purpose, there can be no question now.  "Choose the evil you will do, and do it well."  Then, the bargain.  The point is that evil will occur if Aksinya fails to uphold her part.  We will see the evil in the future, for now, this is a threat and a foreshadowing.
 
Did you wonder at the demon's claim.  He claims not to sin--that he is only a tempter.  This may or may not be true.  Aksinya, in any case, bears the brunt of the sins the demon accomplishes in her name--that is his purpose.
 
Aksinya reveals her own desires after the demon is gone.  The act of crossing herself causes her physical pain.  This is presented as real physical pain, but we can't be certain that it is not psychological.
 
Then the end, Aksinya goes to help Natalya.  She neglects her own work for Natalya's sake.  I'm not certain the demon expected her to do this, but the point is that she takes her evening to help Natalya.  You might wonder at the demon's purpose.

Writing Science Fiction, part 4 Without Telling

I do like to present some deep descriptions of technology in my science fiction. Since I design aircraft, wrote a dissertation on insect flight, and have a patent for a winglet, I think I have some basis for giving my readers a degree of scientific explanation and excitement. I teach classes and write technical papers about this stuff, so I should be able to get it right. In my mind, that is the brilliance of science fiction. That is, to be able to express a new technology or a new idea within the context of a story or novel and make that new technology alive and reasonable to the reader. That, of course, isn't the primary purpose of science fiction, but it is one of the primary building blocks of science fiction. So then, what is the purpose of science fiction? And what does this discussion have to do with what I left you with last time--"how to get across the framework without telling about it." Let's go back to the basics of writing. I already made the point that writing is about storyline, plot, and theme. All three have to support each other and all three are critical to any writing. There must always be a reason for your choice of writing genre and style. The choice shouldn't be just to sell books, what you like, or whatever. You chose the style and genre to get across the theme. A science fiction theme is well suited by the exposition of an idea that can't be conveyed by a modern novel. My series, The Chronicles of the Dragon and the Fox, www.DragonandFox.com is a great example of this. I wanted to write a series of novels about honor as a theme. I wanted to reflect on ideas that in the modern world are not as black and white as they were in the past. I could have chosen to write a set of historical fiction novels, but the ideas I wanted to express were timeless and I wanted to put them like a gem in the center of a black velvet cushion. That cushion was the science fiction world I created to set off the theme of the novel. This wasn't a backdoor choice; it was a cognizant choice to express a theme that would otherwise not have a mode of expression. And that's the point. The choice of the genre and style and person (first, second, third) are not choices of convenience, they are choices of expression for the theme.


That comes full circle back to the point from last time--"how to get across the framework without telling about it." The choice of the plotline is derived from the theme. The storyline flows from the plotline. When I set up the universe of the Dragon and the Fox, my theme was honor (you can see the details in the secret pages about each book). I needed a means to set up a culture that was driven by honor. The basis for this culture was genetic manipulation that developed leaders. Those leaders became eventually feudal style aristocrats. They fulfilled their functions too well, but they were a society ordered and controlled by honor. Against this background, this framework, I could write a set of novels about honor. Broadly, since one of my uhmm...hobbies is ancient Anglo-Saxon, I could make a world like that of the ancient Anglo-Saxons, driven by honor, but set in a future to make the concepts as timeless as possible. The undergirding of the culture was gene manipulation to make leaders; the outcome was a feudal based society and hierarchy. The framework was critical, but it is hidden and known by the characters--the unspoken truth, the 800 pound gorilla in the corner. I used a prolog in each novel to convey and build on the basis of the culture. This was an old Jack Vance technique that I loved in his novels. He usually used it throughout. I only build the prologs to convey the background. The prologs in Dragon and Fox are short, simple, to the point and written as though they were encyclopedia entries by a verbose and pompous academian. The point is to give a little humor. You can read the books without reading the prologs--you'll still get every point, but the prologs set the stage for each novel. They give hints and flashes about the culture and universe you are about to enter. Still, they are not completely necessary. I use other methods to convey the depth of the issues in the culture, but I'll show you some of those next time. The main points here--the theme chooses the genre. The purpose of style, genre, and person are to forward the theme and for no other reason. Writers shouldn't pick science fiction as their style just because they just like it--they need to have something to say and chose the best means to say it. That is the ultimate point!