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Showing posts with label beat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label beat. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

A New Novel, Part 275 I Forbid You to Tell Them Why I Beat You

6 July 2011, A New Novel, Part 275 I Forbid You to Tell Them Why I Beat You

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.

Aksinya is on trial in Wien, Austria.  Following lunch, the court reconvenes.  The presiding judge calls Natalya to the witness chair.  Aksinya abjures Natalya to tell the truth...

“Yes, you must testify and ensure you tell the truth, Lady Natalya.”
Natalya nodded and presented a very worried look on her face.
Sergeant Nagel led Natalya to the witness chair. 
Judge Richter put down his handkerchief, “Judges, please don’t let any of the previous conversation or actions cloud your judgment.  I only allowed it because it seemed an appropriate greeting between friends.”  He tried to put on a stern look, “Lady Natalya, please announce your full name to the court.”
Natalya’s voice was soft but clear, “I am the Lady Natalya Alexandrovna Obolenska.”
“What is your relationship to the Princess Aksinya.”
Natalya put her hands together, “The Count…Princess I mean, rescued me.  No one else in the world would help me, but she did.”
“Rescued you?”
“I was a handmaiden to a noble family in Minsk.  They treated me like a slave.  The Princess rescued me from there and offered me the position of her lady-in-waiting.  She gave me clothing and jewelry.  She cared for me and sent me to school.  She called me her friend and confidant.”
“Can you describe the events of the evening when the Princess beat you?”
“It was the evening that the Princess was supposed to deliver her answer to Herr von Taaffe.”
“Her answer to what?”
“To his proposal of marriage.  Ernst von Taaffe offered to marry her and his father the Graf von Taaffe encouraged the match.  I knew her answer before she gave it.”
“Did she tell you what she would answer the young man?”
“No, Ernst von Taaffe is an honorable man, but he had two very important books that belonged to the Princess.  She wanted them back.  I knew that no matter what happened, her desire for the books would cloud her thinking.”
“What does this have to do with the Princess beating you?”
“This is the reason she beat me.”
“What was the reason?”
Aksinya stood.  Natalya stood.  Half the courtroom stood.  Aksinya pointed her finger, “Lady Natalya, I forbid you to tell them why I beat you.”
Father Dobrushin pulled Aksinya back into her seat, “The press has already published the reason in the papers.  She announced it during the ecclesiastical trial.  There is no reason for you to stop her testimony.”

Yesterday, Aksinya told Natalya to tell the truth.  This worries Natalya.  In any case, the scene is set to hear Natalya's testimony.

Notice how I "show" you the effect of Natalya and Aksinya's reunion on the presiding judge and judges.  I show you that Judge Richter put down his handkerchief.  The implication is that he was affected by their words and actions.  The others were also affected, note the presiding judge instructs the other judges, and he gives Natalya a stern look.

The judge asks Natalya her name and then her relationship with Aksinya.  You would expect Natalya to answer that she was Aksinya's lady-in-waiting etc.  Watch carefully, instead, she tells the court, not her position in Aksinya's household, but rather what Aksinya did for her.  We could have guessed this was the most important issue to Natalya.  Natalya defines herself based on what Aksinya did for her--she worships Aksinya. 

Then we get to the answer the judge expected, but Natalya's answer is still couched in therms of what Aksinya did, listen: "...offered me the position of her lady-in-waiting.  She gave me clothing and jewelry.  She cared for me and sent me to school.  She called me her friend and confidant.”  The judge asked a simple question and received an entire history of Aksinya, so he moves on to the events.

The events of that evening were very critical to the case.  Natalya fills in all the details and becomes more detailed than the judge expected--she mentions the books.  Like real life, we get to the point in a circular manner.  The judge wants to go directly to the point; Natalya wants to tell the truth.  This gets to the reason Aksinya beat Natalya--do you remember, Aksinya would not answer this question--this is the critical question.  Aksinya does not want this answer to come out.  The answer to this question will destroy Natalya and Ernst socially.

This is the reason Aksinya doesn't want anyone to answer the question.  The problem is that the cat is already out of the bag.  Aksinya imagines she can protect her friends--she can't.  As Father Dobrushin knows and pointed out--he will save her.  He might not be able to save the others, but he will save Aksinya from prison and the workhouse--if he can.  Tomorrow, the reason.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

A New Novel, Part 192 Should I Beat You?

A New Novel, Part 192 Should I Beat You?

For those who haven’t been following this blog, let me introduce it a little. I am currently blogging my 21st novel that has the working title Daemon. The novel is about Aksinya, a sorceress, who, to save her family from the Bolsheviks, called and contracted the demon, Asmodeus. Her family was murdered anyway, and she fled with the demon from Russia to Austria.

Matushka Ekaterina is a very wise and well trained woman.  She is comforting the distraught Aksinya...

“No, I think I loved her, but I killed her.” Aksinya let out a sob, “Why did I make that sound? What’s wrong with me?” Her shoulders shuddered.


Ekaterina moved next to Aksinya. She put her arms around the girl.

Aksinya sobbed again in a hoarse whisper, “You shouldn’t try to comfort me. Instead of comfort, I beat Natalya. I don’t deserve comfort.”

“Everyone who is confessed deserves comfort. That is what we call agape love.”

“I see. I wish I could see Natalya. I miss her so much.” Aksinya buried her face in her arms. Aksinya couldn’t speak for a while, “Do you think she will hate me now?”

“She may hate you.”

“Do you think that is why I am so sad?”

“I think there are many reasons why you are sad.” She gently stroked Aksinya’s hair.

“You really shouldn’t try to comfort me. I should not be comforted.”

Ekaterina held her more tightly, “Should I beat you?”

“It might be a good idea.”

“You said you were in pain already.”

“I am in great pain.”

“Is it from your burns?”

“Yes.”

“Then there is no reason to beat you if you are already in pain.”

“I see,” Aksinya sobbed.

“Why don’t you tell me about yourself?”

“Will that help you to love me?”

“Yes, and it will help me get to know you.”

Aksinya's confession was not over.  The morning just continues what the night had begun.  Aksinya is overwrought.  She is crying and she doesn't even understand what it is to cry.  She is in pain for many reasons, but doesn't connect her sadness with the pain she obviously feels in her heart.

Ekaterina is very compassionate and well trained at her job as the Matushka of the Ecclesia.  She comforts Aksinya.  Listen to her gentle, but strong tone.  I intentionally don't use much description in this scene so you will be drawn to Aksinya's words as well as her sadness.

Aksinya has a truly contrite heart.  She desires punishment to atone for her sin and evil.  Ekaterina's attitude is perfectly correct--the repentant deserve comfort.  That is indeed agape love.  God will not forgive without repentance and the repentant heart is a beautiful thing.  Aksinya could never see herself as beautiful at this time, but there is a beauty and serenity in her childish confession and childish view of the world.  It is still a world she does not fully understand.

Aksinya really did love Natalya.  She knows there has been a great breach in their trust and that breach might result in hate.  The theme about wishing to see Natalya is a foreshadowing and a recurring theme.  Ekaterina does not candy coat Aksinya's problems--Natalya might hate you.  Aksinya asks a very childlike question: “Do you think that is why I am so sad?”  We know why she is sad.  We know why Aksinya weeps.  We know that something monumental has happened in the life of this small, unloved, and unpretty woman who is Aksinya.  Aksinya cannot grasp what has happened.

Still, within the person who is Aksinya is still the Aksinya we know.  Listen to her response:“You really shouldn’t try to comfort me. I should not be comforted.”  She tells Ekaterina she should beat her--just as she beat Natalya.  Did you catch that.  Still Aksinya is already in pain and that pain is a direct consequence of her confession and previous actions.  Do you see the wonderful irony in this.  She wishes to be punished, yet she already is being punished.  This is what Ekaterina tells her in not so many words.  Then the Matushka asks the question we have wanted to ask Aksinya since the beginning: “Why don’t you tell me about yourself?” We wanted to ask this of Aksinya.  We wanted to know more about her life.  I give you this through Ekaterina.  It is part of Aksinya's therapy.  It is part of her confession.  Tomorrow, about Aksinya.