Development - Science in Science Fiction

27 June 2012, Development - Science in Science Fiction

Introduction: I wrote the novel Aksinya: Enchantment and the Daemon. This was my 21st novel and through this blog, I gave you the entire novel in installments that included commentary on the writing. In the commentary, in addition to other general information on writing, I explained, how the novel was constructed, the metaphors and symbols in it, the writing techniques and tricks I used, and the way I built the scenes. You can look back through this blog and read the entire novel beginning with http://www.pilotlion.blogspot.com/2010/10/new-novel-part-3-girl-and-demon.html.

I'm using this novel as an example of how I produce, market, and eventually (we hope) get a novel published. I'll keep you informed along the way.

Today's Blog: To see the steps in the publication process, visit my writing website http://www.ldalford.com/ and select "production schedule," you will be sent to http://www.sisteroflight.com/.

I wrote in detail about how to study history and culture to write historical fiction. That moved to how to write about culture in science fiction, and now, I am exploring how to study to write science fiction.

If you want to write science fiction, you need to understand science.  I've tried to give you some rules of thumb to determine the reliability of scientific papers and information.  Just understanding this information will help you understand the basics of science.  Using this information will help you determine the validity of the science you study.  The important point is that you have to work to study, and if you want to have enough science knowledge to write science fiction, you have to study science.
I'll write about the rules of writing tomorrow.

I'll repeat my published novel websites so you can see more examples: http://www.ldalford.com/, and the individual novel websites: http://www.aegyptnovel.com/, http://www.centurionnovel.com/, http://www.thesecondmission.com/, http://www.theendofhonor.com/, http://www.thefoxshonor.com/, and http://www.aseasonofhonor.com/.

A New Novel, Part 66 Changes in the World end of Chapter 6

It seems strange to us and slightly funny that an aristocrat expected to be dressed and undressed by their servants.  What I try to show you is how expected and common it was at the time.  Although Aksinya called Natalya her friend, Aksinya still expects to be waited on--that is the way of the world.  Still those ways may change.

After supper, Aksinya and Natalya went back up to their rooms. Natalya undressed Aksinya and put a silk nightgown on her. She brushed out Aksinya’s short hair. After a while, Aksinya took the brush from Natalya’s hand. She told Natalya, “Put on your nightgown and come to my room.” Natalya returned quickly.

Aksinya patted the top of her bed. She sat and Aksinya began to brush her long hair. Natalya put her face in her hands, “I really wish you wouldn’t do that, mistress.”

“Tomorrow, Lady Natalya, we will begin our studies together. We will still be a Countess and a lady, but we will also be students and friends together.”

Natalya turned abruptly, “Do you really think of me as your friend?”

“Yes.” Aksinya smiled, “I never really had a friend before. You are my friend, Lady Natalya. Would you address me as, Aksinya?”

“No…no, I could never do that.”

“What if I just call you, Nata?”

“That’s what my mother called me, but I don’t think it would be allowed.”

“Allowed? Aren’t I allowed to call you whatever I desire?”

“Y…y…yes.”

“Then, in private, I shall call you Nata. I want you to call me, Aksinya.”

“In private. Anywhere you wish, but in private would be fine.” Natalya took another deep breath, “Very well. I will try, Ak…ak…sinya.”

“Thank you, Nata. Tomorrow, we will begin a new kind of life together and in our world, it is a new thing, is it not?”

“Yes, mistress.”

We see the normal expectation, Natalya dresses Aksinya for bed and then prepares her for bed.  That's the nightgown and brushing the hair.  Aksinya asks Natalya to prepare for bed and turns the tables on her.  Can you see this happening.  Can you see Natalya's embarrassment and Aksinya's joy.  Aksinya is serving her lady-in-waiting, and the lady-in-waiting doesn't like it.  This is classical culture in this time.  I have even experienced similar things myself in the modern era in Europe.
Look at Aksinya's response: we will still be Countess and lady, but we will be...friends.  How that small statement would make Natalya's heart soar.  Yet, she is so worried about that statement, she has to ask: do you think of me as your friend?  It is not so unbelievable as it is unexpected and yet so odd to Natalya who obviously had few if any friends.

Then we see, Aksinya confesses she didn't have any friends before, and we have to ask ourselves again about the Aksinya we don't know.  Aksinya clenches her points with an extravagant intimacy--call me by my first name.  This is culturally a big deal at the time.  Thus Natalya's answer: I could never do that.  Aksinya opens the bidding with the offer to call Natalya, Nata a common Russian diminutive and endearment for Natalya.  Aksinya guessed right because this was what Natalya's mother called her.  Natalya's answer is classic too: it wouldn't be allowed.

Then, Aksinya pulls the nobility's power--I can do whatever I want.  Which is true.  Natalya barely accedes, and we know she will have problems with this little rule of Aksinya's.  Still, this represents the point at the end of the chapter.  The main point that Aksinya has been making to Natalya the entire time.  They will begin a new kind of life together, and Natalya's answer, so ambivalent--yes mistress, shows although Aksinya's thinks her feet are planted in a different place, perhaps Natalya's and, by extension, Aksinya's are really not.

The end of this little scene is an example of how I like to end a chapter.  In a single dialog with a chencher, I wrap up the entire chapter.  The end words convey all the emotion and effect of everything on Natalya as well as the effort of Aksinya.  So in response to Aksinya's opining about the changes they will and have seen, Natalya simply says, "Yes mistress," and by that indicates that she doesn't believe the changes will or have affected her.

Tomorrow we begin a new chapter in Daemon (working title), chapter 7.

A New Novel, Part 42 The Proposal Part 2

We saw the proposal--Aksinya's uncle and aunt want her to attend the gymnasium for girls, Sacré Coeur.  This idea came from Asmodeus--it was likely a suggestion in the telegram.  Asmodeus chose this aunt and uncle, this school, this city for exactly his own purpose.  I haven't shown you that purpose yet, but I did give a big hint.  I revealed to you that the demon would have more scope to torture Aksinya in the West than in Russia.

Aunt Brunhilda clasped Aksinya’s left hand with both of hers. “We wish to enroll you in my old school, Sacré Coeur. It is a school, a gymnasium, for girls here in Wien. The church runs it, and it is connected with a convent of the same name. I know it is something you have never experienced before, but I believe you will blossom in it.”


Aksinya stared at her aunt. Then she turned her stare at the demon. Asmodeus’ face was covered with a scowl. He stood, “Freiherr, I’m not sure the Countess should be placed in this kind of environment. She is a very sensitive young woman who is not used to being among so many people.”

The Freiherr immediately warmed to his argument, “The Countess would have her lady-in-waiting to take care of her. She would be boarded in the style of a princess. She would possess the highest rank of anyone in Sacré Coeur.”

The demon didn’t back down, “But the Countess isn’t used to being away from her family.“

Aunt Brunhilda clasped Aksinya’s fingers a little tighter, “We are her family now. She may come stay with us on the weekends. She will certainly go to church with us and dine with us, and she may bring as many of her friends as she likes for the weekend.”

Asmodeus straightened, “Is all this certain?”

The Freiherr stuck out his chest, “It is a surety and a promise.”

“Do you swear?”

Baronet Herman Bockmann’s eyebrows rose, “Yes, I guess. I do swear.”

Asmodeus bowed, “Good. Then the Countess shall attend Sacré Coeur. Should we visit the school tomorrow?”

Aksinya’s brows lowered, “Don’t I have a say?”

Her aunt and uncle stared at her.

Asmodeus' look was dangerous, “Yes, Countess, of course you have a say.” The demon’s voice dripped with menace, “What do you wish? It is your choice, after all.” He glared at her.

Aksinya returned his gaze. Then after a moment, she lowered her head, “I shall go to Sacré Coeur on a trial basis. If I am not happy there, I shall not continue.“

Aunt Brunhilda shook Aksinya’s hand, “What a wonderful answer.”

Her uncle lit another cigarette, “Yes, very wise. It shall be on a trial basis. We shall see how all of us like it. I would rather have you here all the time with us, Countess, but I am willing to give you up during the week for your own improvement and education.”

Aksinya mumbled under her breath then she glanced up, “I will attend on a trial basis only if my lady-in-waiting may attend too.” Aksinya continued before anyone could respond, “The Lady Natalya is incredibly bright and educated. She would succeed very well in such an environment.”

The Freiherr glanced at Natalya then back at Aksinya, “Certainly, I don’t see any reason why the Lady Natalya cannot attend with you. Her primary job must be your care, but she may attend and study with you.”

Aksinya bowed her head, “Thank you.”

“You are very welcome,” Aunt Brunhilda smiled and stood. Now, let us ladies retire to my sitting room where I will inform you both all about Sacré Coeur. ”

Reluctantly Aksinya stood. Natalya bounced up. They followed Aunt Brunhilda to the second floor and her sitting room.

The demon is a consumate actor.  Look at his response.  He plays the "devil's advocate" and gives a counter arguement.  His focus isn't the arguement, it is to get Freiherr Bockmann to swear.  You can imagine why this is so important to a demon.  It means there is a resolve to act.  It means there is a contract.   When and if (it will be when) Aksinya can no longer continue at the school, Freiherr Bockmann will be forced to break his promise (contract).  This is the way with all good, even if we swear to achieve it, we make it all wrong when we cannot achieve what we have agreed to do.
 
Then Aksinya takes matters into her own hands for just a singular moment.  She defies the demon.  She matches his gaze, but can't hold it.  She knows she wants to go to the school.  So does the demon.  Aksinya attaches two criteria to the proposal: it is a trial and Natalya must attend.  You can see the reaction of both.  Aksinya is reluctant--she lost out, but achieved what she wanted.  Still she worries about the ramifications of the demon's choice.  Natalya bounces up--her mistress thought of her and gave her a great gift.  That is the end of chapter 5.  I need to get writing.  I just finished the first run through of chapter 11 and started chapter 12.

A New Novel, Part 41 The Proposal Part 1

So now we get the point of almost everything.  Freiherr Bockmann makes a proposal to Aksinya that truly tempts her.  She can't let it seem she it too interested, but she is truly tempted by what he proposes.  Do you think Asmodeus had anything to do with the proposal?

The fire was still burning in the great fireplace, but it was mostly coals with only a light sprinkling of flames. Aunt Brunhilda led Aksinya to a chair and sat her. She took a seat in the chair beside her and held her hand.


The Freiherr stood. He stepped to the fireplace and lit a cigarette. He took a puff and turned around, “You don’t know how pleased we are that you came to us and that you are safe here with us.” He flicked some ash from his cigarette into the coals, “When we heard about your family, I had the priest make a high Mass in their honor. At the time, we thought you had died with them.” He gave her a crooked smile, “We were glad someone survived and that you survived. You being who you are, after all.”

Aksinya lowered her eyes, “Thank you.”

“Your Aunt and I have discussed this since we heard you were coming.” He smiled again, “You are not quite seventeen, am I correct?”

“I am seventeen, Uncle.”

“How much education have you received?”

“None except from our family’s priest and my governess.”

“In the past that might have been sufficient for a young lady. Today, it is woefully deficient. As I remember, you have always been very keen on learning.”

Aksinya tried to appear disinterested, but in spite of herself, she nodded and leaned forward expectantly.

“Yes, I see I am right. Your German is much better than you led us to believe last night. I see you understand me very well.” His eyes crinkled, “You learned it from your mother, I know. And I know you speak French and can read Greek.”

“Yes, Uncle.”

“What do you think about the idea of an education.”

Aksinya smiled, “What did you have in mind, Uncle?”

“There is an excellent gymnasium in this city.”

Aunt Brunhilda laughed, “I went to it myself.”

“What is a gymnasium?”

“It is a school for students who will go on to a university.”

“To a university? Could I attend a university—is it allowed for women?”

Aunt Brunhilda put her hands together, “Yes, it is very possible for you to go on to a university.”

“I would gladly attend, but for what purpose?”

The Freiherr stood straight and threw the butt of his cigarette in the coals, “Ha, the world we once knew well is changing. The future will belong to men and women who have grasped an education, and who have an aristocratic pedigree. The people will need someone to lead them. This is what we wish for you. It is certainly what your father and mother would have desired.”

“I’m not so sure. You tempt me...”

Asmodeus cleared his throat.

Her uncle grinned, “I want to tempt you. I want you to follow this course, and I think you are well fitted to succeed. You always were a studious child.”

Aksinya sighed, “What exactly do you propose, Uncle?”

Aunt Brunhilda clasped Aksinya’s left hand with both of hers. “We wish to enroll you in my old school, Sacré Coeur. It is a school, a gymnasium, for girls here in Wien. The church runs it, and it is connected with a convent of the same name. I know it is something you have never experienced before, but I believe you will blossom in it.”

We begin with a slight remembrance of Aksinya's loss.  Her uncle reminds her while he begins his introduction.  Do you see the multi-level mystery he invokes.  They were happy she survived of all the others--this should get you thinking.  I'm not going to tell you why yet.  The point is emphasized twice.  Then he brings up the next point--to him it is important and important to the demon.  Asmodeus chose her clothing.  Her uncle should know her age, he assumes she is younger--who might have put that thought in her mind.  The first point is her age--she is young yet.  The second point is her education.  She, like most aristocratic women in this age, was educated by the family governess and priest.
 
Her uncle then praises her.  He praises her German, French, and Greek.  She knows German from her mother (a clue), French from the Russian court, and Greek from the Orthodox church.  Her uncle's pont is to tempt her toward an education.  You might wonder why the demon wants Aksinya to get an education.  Keep thinking.
 
The next idea is the gymnasium.  I use a trick of a question in the dialog to tell you what it is.  Aksinya doesn't know, so I can explain what it is to the reader.  The obvious question to Aksinya is whether a woman can aspire to the university--this was not expected at the time.  We get a shot of the culture.  Her uncle is tempting her.  He uses a hard argument "your mother and father would have wanted it."  See the reaction of Aksinya--she realizes what is happening.  The demon threatens her just a little, and Aksinya sighs.  She realizes she can't win against her aunt and uncle, the demon, and her own desires.  We end the first part of this dialog with the revelation that the gymnasium is a convent school run by the church.  Do you begin to understand why the demon might want to put Aksinya there--ah, we will find out soon.

A New Novel, Part 39 Dressing Aksinya

There are multiple duplicities going on here.  Look especially at what Asmodeus chose for her to wear. 

In the morning, Natalya drew Aksinya a bath, and helped Aksinya into it. When Natalya returned to the main bedroom, she found Aksinya’s trunk with a note on it. Crisp Russian handwriting described one of the wonderful gowns she had fitted to Aksinya. Natalya searched through the trunk and pulled out the gown. It was a light parchment color with lace all around. The dress was both formal and yet wonderfully intimate. It was made of light silk and fine silk lace covered it.


Natalya retrieved Aksinya from the bath and dried her off. When Natalya dressed Aksinya in the gown, it fit her shape wonderfully. It was loose, but fit Aksinya tightly. It did not draw attention to Aksinya’s lack of bosom, but rather accentuated her slight and girlish figure. It made her slim hips look feminine and stylish. Natalya would have liked to see Aksinya wear it to a grand social affair. She knew it would show off her mistress’ best features, although it did make her appear younger than she was. As she settled the dress on Aksinya’s slim figure, Natalya fingered the crosses she had sewed in the fabric and wondered why Aksinya had made her put them there. At the last, Natalya placed a small square silk and lace cap on Aksinya’s head. She pinned the cap and then Aksinya’s hair and pulled her bangs into a part across her forehead.

Aksinya took a glance at herself in the mirror, something she rarely did and smiled. Natalya smiled behind her. Aksinya’s appearance was almost radiant.

He did it again.  The demon chose a thin dress in the middle of winter.  Look at the material and the color.  It is out of place--out of season.  Remember Aunt Brunhilda.  Natalya fits Aksinya better into her clothing than Aunt Brunhilda's seamstress, but still...  The dress is very elegant, but it makes her look like a girl and not a woman.  This will play in the coming scene.  Natalya applauds the choice because?  I wrote it before, but I need to foreshadow this a little.  Natalya obviously views Aksinya as someone to take care of.  She sees her like a sister.  She wants to dress her up, like a doll.  Look at the attention to detail Natalya places on her mistress.  Notice the care with the hair and the cap.  It was such a wonderful change, Aksinya smiled.  This is obviously the single most important thing to Natalya--to please Aksinya.  The dress was chosen by the demon to make Aksinya appear younger and less mature--the reason, we will soon discover.
 
I also took the time to remind you of the crosses on the dresses.  We still don't know if they will work.  Obviously, Aksinya wishes to prevent the demon from removing her clothing as a torture to compel her to act.  We also can guess that she hopes the crosses protect her and Natalya from the influence of the demon.  We and she don't know if this will work at all.
 
Finally, the last picture before the transition is Natalya behind Aksinya at the mirror.  I love this picture.  We see Aksinya backed in every way by her lady-in-waiting both in image and reality.

A New Novel, Part 35 Freiherr and Freifrau Bockmann

I know I have been remiss at revealing everything in the book--I hope you caught it.  I don't think I will have the opportunity to revisit anything unless there are specific questions.  In this installment, I will show you extensive scene setting in the narrative.  First, I will show you enough description of the interior of the house to allow your own imagination to take over the rest.  There is a critical balance in not showing too much--that overburdens the reader and chokes the storyline.  And too little--that leaves the reader adrift without an appropriately set scene.  Note, the characters too.  Here I introduce two important secondary characters.  They must have their own descriptions.

They made their way up the marble steps up to the large front door. The servant opened the great oaken portal and let them in.

They entered a wonderful and huge marble and statue lined entry that overlooked an enormous open ballroom. They stood in an unenclosed foyer bordered before them by a wide set of stairs that led down to the floor of the ballroom. On the other side of the ballroom, twin wooden stairways led to the second floor. The stairways climbed into each other and joined then separated again and continued to the upper floor.

When Aksinya, Natalya, Asmodeus, and the servant entered, a host of maids descended on them. They took Aksinya’s coat and Natalya’s cloak. Aksinya then spotted a very well dressed man and a woman who had descended, unnoticed, to the center of the house’s converging stairways. Asmodeus stepped forward and called in a loud voice, “May I announce, the Countess Aksinya Andreiovna Golitsyna and her lady-in-waiting, the Lady Natalya Alexandrovna Obolenska.”

The man and woman made their way slowly down the steps. The moment Aksinya’s coat had come off, she began to shiver. She had not eaten, and she was cold. She wondered automatically if the demon had anything to do with her sudden discomfort. He turned to her that moment and grinned. Aksinya scowled back at him. She impatiently watched her uncle and aunt make their way to them. She certainly would not move. She was too cold, and she knew how these things worked. She had lived in this type of society all her life. It was a painful reminder of the life she left when her family died.

Her uncle and aunt finally made their way to the ballroom floor and stepped slowly across the ballroom. They made their way to the wide foyer steps and then up them. Her uncle stood before her and grasped her hand. His face was thin and well lined. Still, it seemed as jovial as Aksinya remembered it. She always thought he endeavored to convey a haughty appearance of aristocracy, but that attempt was constantly overwhelmed by his gentle features. He sported a wide mustache and a pointed beard. He put the unnecessary monocle in his left eye this time. He routinely forgot which eye was supposed to require it. This evening, he wore a fine woolen suit with coat and tails. He went to his left knee and touched her white-gloved hand with his lips. He spoke in German, “Countess, I am your uncle, Freiherr Herman Bockmann, and this is your aunt, the Freifrau Brunhilda Bockmann. I hope you remember us. I welcome you to our home.” He stood and Aksinya’s aunt stepped forward. Aksinya had remembered her name was Brunhilda. She always thought that was so funny when she was a child. Freifrau Bockmann was tall and stout. She had a well endowed bosom and clothing that was just a little too small for her. Aksinya remembered her mother’s words about Aunt Brunhilda, “That her sister-in-law was always one season and one size out of style.” Aksinya couldn’t help but smile at the remembrance. Indeed, Aunt Brunhilda wore a silk dress of a bright summer hue. Yet, she wore it with grace. Aunt Brunhilda looked well in anything.

Aunt Brunhilda took her hand and curtsied to the floor, “Welcome, Countess.” She glanced up and smiled, “I am so glad you came to us.”

Did you notice the revelation (or perhaps a remembrance) of some of Aksinya's past.  This little revelation ties Aksinya into the scene and bridges the relationship with her aunt and uncle.

Next the description of the Bockmanns.  I give you a little paradox in each.  First, I introduce Freiherr Bockman.  He is not a caricature of an Austrian Nobleman.  I tell you he is a Freiherr (not a Baron), that puts your thinking outside the normal box.  Next, he is described as attempting to be the caricature of an Austrian Nobleman--we knew that from before in the dialog of the demon.  Second, Freifrau Bockmann is described as wearing too tight clothing that is out of style, but still she appears elegant.  These small paradoxes force you to see the characters as more than simply stereotyped nobles.  They also force you to think about the characters.  This locks them in your brain.  I can then remind you in later scenes and reset your thinking to let you see them as the characters they are.

Next, did you notice how the demon is manipulating Aksinya.  He brought her in an open carriage (likely from manipulation of her uncle or a suggestion in the telegram--why let out all the demon's secrets at once).  She has not eaten.  The maids too her coat.  She is wearing the dress he chose--it is lace and thin.  She is freezing.  We feel her impatience in the slow walk of her aunt and uncle to greet her.  We will see how this fits in the next installment.

Finally, I reminded you of the relationship between Aksinya and her uncle and aunt--this is new information.  It ties Aksinya to these people through her mother and gives you a hint about her mother.

You can see there is a lot in each tiny piece of a scene.  I should get to this detail in every "revelation" to you, but I usually don't have time.  This is Sunday and I am drinking a caupachino, a martini with olives and avocado, and smoking a great cigar.  In a moment, I will be adding to chapter 11.  Happy reading.

A New Novel, Part 33 Uncle Bockmann plus threats

The arrival in Wein.  We see the initial interaction between Aksinya and Asmodeus.  The purpose for their coming to Wien isn't clear.  Let me explain it to you.  The demon wishes to degrade Aksinya as completely as possible.  In Russia, he can only see her death.  The Bolsheviks murder the aristocrats.  In the west much more effective means of degradation are possible.  We will see examples very quickly.  You can begin to imagine yourself.  In Russia, we would get a show trial, some torture, and death.  In the west, there are excruciatingly long term means of causing suffering.  The courts with a accusation.  Ecclesiastical courts with their taint of true evil.  Just keep in mind that the purpose of the demon is to do evil--to and for Aksinya.
They exited the train near the locomotive and immediately a carriage with a pair of white horses pulled up to the platform. Natalya laid Aksinya’s heavy mink coat over her shoulders. Aksinya pulled it close, and Natalya tied the clasp under Aksinya’s chin. Natalya pulled her own black woolen cloak over her shoulders. She buried her nose in the thick fabric for a moment, smiled in a very reassured way then tied the clasp.

Asmodeus pointed with his open hand. The carriage driver was overdressed in fine aristocratic livery. He helped Aksinya then Natalya up into the carriage. He put out his hand to Asmodeus, but Asmodeus instead made a gesture toward the driver’s seat. The driver climbed up to his seat and the demon took a place across from the ladies. He faced the rear.

When the driver was in his place, Asmodeus put up his hand and spoke in perfect German, “Proceed driver.”

The driver responded, also in German, “Yes, sir.”

After they exited the station, they were quickly surrounded by tall buildings. When they were well away from the station, Aksinya asked, “Where are we going, demon?”

“You should be able to guess, countess.”

Aksinya glared at him, “You planned this trip. I had no part in it.”

“The answer should be simple, especially for you. I told you, you could not remain in Russia. There was too much danger for you. I also told you I would convey you to a safe place where you could find relatives who would take you in.”

“So where are we going?”

“You don’t remember?”

“This isn’t a game.”

“But it is, countess. It is a great game.” The demon leaned closer to her, “We are enroute to your Uncle’s house. He is a Freiherr of the Austrian realm… and within the aristocracy of not much account. A Freiherr is a baron in Russian.

Aksinya crossed her arms and replied in German, “I understand very well what a Freiherr is.”

The demon continued without a pause, “His name is Freiherr Herman Bockmann. He is your father’s brother.”

Aksinya’s response was tart, “I know who he is.”

“So everything comes back to you now.”

Aksinya glared, “I understood from the beginning.”

“I know you did. Your uncle will love to take care of you. He will be pleased to invite a real Russian countess into his home and society.”

“I don’t like him, and I will not do as you ask.”

“Why don’t you like him? He is upright in his life and his business. Too upright for my tastes, but he is driven by the idea of nobility and aristocracy. He is tempted to it in much the same way you are tempted to touch yourself.”

Aksinya glanced at the lady at her side, “Shut up, idiot demon. Natalya…”

“The Lady Natalya hears what I wish her to hear.”

Aksinya leaned back and put her hand under her chin. She looked out the side of the carriage.

“Listen very carefully to me, Countess.”

Aksinya scowled.

“Whatever your Uncle proposes, you will accept it.”

“And if I don’t?”

“You have already faced that before,” the demon smiled.

“I doubt you will take my clothing off of me in front of my uncle. I don’t think you will harm my servant before him. What do I have to fear from you?”

“If you use your mind, I believe you can imagine many ways that I might make your life miserable. Chiefly, your Uncle thinks of himself as moving in the highest strata of culture, society, and nobility. He is absorbed by it. He celebrates within the church because it separates the common from their betters. What if his niece were reveled as an ugly and common girl who is involved in sorcery? What do you think would happen to his place in society? A countess from Russian is one thing. A countess can be a pathetic being, deserving of pity and love. This specific countess who was chased from her home and lands by the communists and Bolsheviks is especially deserving of pity. Her family was murdered as she watched. On the other hand, an ugly girl who practices sorcery and might have used her curses to escape while she left her family alone to die, is one deserving of only rebuke and punishment.”

“You would reveal yourself…”

“Perhaps, but I am a demon. My position in society is meaningless. To your uncle, his position is everything. The shock might kill him. It would certainly ruin him…and you.”

Aksinya wouldn’t look at the demon, “I won’t promise you anything.”

The demon smiled, “…but you will do as I ask. That’s the answer I wanted from you…”

The demon again gets Aksinya's acquiescence without anything but a threat.  He will increase his attacks, but as long as Aksinya doesn't fight back, he will dominate her.  If she fights back, she will gain little relief.

A New Novel, Part 28 The Disguise

Here we see a neat technique to describe a person through the eyes and conversation of another.  Likewise, we see a means to describe a change in appearance that isn't actually physical.

Natalya stared at Aksinya. Her hands reached up to touch her own face, but it felt no different than before.


Aksinya smiled, “You may speak now. The enchantment is finished.” She turned away a little, “Put away my things, demon. I did as you wished.”

Natalya stuck out her hand, “Countess, you look so different. Like an old grandmother. Your beautiful dress is now rags.”

“Look at yourself in the next dark window glass we pass. You are an ancient granny yourself. You will find you smell like one, look like one, are dressed as one, and sound like one. In time, our appearance and clothing will turn back to what it should be. That is, unless I make a second enchantment. Unfortunately, we can’t change our clothing until then.”

“You will not be able to bathe.”

Aksinya muttered under her breath, “It is simply another torment from my personal demon.”

Natalya might not have heard her, “I’m sorry, countess.”

Aksinya didn’t turn toward the demon, “Asmodeus, I did as you wished. We are ready to go.”

“You performed well, countess. Are you certain you don’t want to wait for the young, drunken Bolsheviks?”

Aksinya half turned her head and scowled.

The demon continued, “I know you are feeling that desire.”

Aksinya bit her lip then she began to pray. She had made a rosary as part of the costume of the old women they had become. She couldn’t truly touch the rosary at her fingertips, but by every appearance, she touched it. She began to pray it, and her desire decreased. Asmodeus frowned. He lifted his lips so his fangs showed clearly.

Natalya laughed, “Certainly, old women would pray. They pray continually.” She began to tick off the prayers by counting her rosary. She was completely caught up in the amazement of having something that appeared to move in her hand, but that had no real substance. Even so, the rosary reacted as though she touched it.

Aksinya took Natalya’s arm and together, both praying in almost synchronicity, they walked toward the train station. Glumly, Asmodeus followed behind them with the heavy chest on his shoulders.

We also get to see another small act of rebellion by Aksinya.  We will see that her rebellion comes with repercussions.  The demon is not obvious with his attacks, but we will see the results--remember they are tied directly and indirectly to her actions.

A New Novel, Part 27 Abuse and Disguise

The last time the demon tempted Aksinya, he used physical discomfort and threats to "win" her over.  If that works, why not use it again.  As I mentioned, the "puppy" method is very effective.  One of my readers noted that the demon and Aksinya have a classical abusive relationship going.  Ah, yes, so it is.  Is temptation any different than such a relationship.  If you think about the similarities, you will see amazing parallels.  There is much more in the writing that I have not revealed to you.  That wasn't intentional or unintentional.  It's just that I am really busy and sometimes I have more and less time to spare on "revelations."  Plus, some of the revelations of the multilevels of the writing should be obvious.

They only had to walk about a block before the railway station came into sight. It was brightly lit and filled with activity. They approached the station from the rail side. At the sides of a set of tracks, the demon stopped suddenly. He laid down the chest and turned, “The trains are especially dangerous for you, countess. They will be equally dangerous for your lady-in-waiting.”


“Then why did you bring us this way, you fool?”

“I brought you this way to give you yet another opportunity.”

Aksinya’s head dropped, “What do you want me to do this time?”

“My request is simple. I wish you to make an enchantment that changes both of your external appearances. This way you may travel in safety and comfort.”

Aksinya put her hand over her eyes, “If I won’t do it?”

“If you don’t make this magic, you could walk all the way to Austria. Or, I could strip you like I did before.” The demon grinned around his fangs, “I could strip your lady in waiting. Perhaps I could tempt you to whip her. That would be something she is very used to.” Asmodeus leaned against the chest, “In any case, if you don’t make an enchantment, a group of young Bolsheviks will soon come along these tracks. They have been drinking since noon. They will rape your lady-in-waiting and attempt to rape you. I will have to step in to protect you and do your bidding. I suspect you will be so mortified you will ask me to kill them. For rape, I can even torture them in front of you before I kill them.”

“You are cruel, demon.”

“I have been called that many, many times, so it must be true. Quickly, what is your decision?”

Aksinya whispered, “I will do as you ask.” She spoke more loudly, “What of Lady Natalya? Didn’t she hear what you said to me? How you threatened me?”

“Only what I allowed her to hear. She will be very pleased to see you make such a great enchantment. And it must be great. You must make it strong enough to last seven days.”

Aksinya spat at the ground, “Get my things and my book. The great brown one.”

Asmodeus obliged. Natalya stared as Aksinya drew a magic circle large enough to encompass them both. Aksinya placed candles at the five corners of the pentagram. She gathered wax and clay then bits of cloth from a box. She shaped them a little with heads and arms and legs then stuck sprigs of an odd herb in them. She lit the candles and a brazier of incense. When she was done with her preparations, she sat in the center of the circle with Natalya beside her and the book on the stolen stand before her. She closed her eyes, “Listen, Lady Natalya, you must not say anything. No matter what you hear or what happens, don’t make a sound from your mouth, from your vocal cords. This is very important. I will be speaking in Latin. The forms and the words are very important. It is like a word and sacrament in the church. The words are those I must say for the enchantment to work and the implements are sacraments. They are the corporal things that will cause the world to change. Remember don’t say a word.”

Natalya nodded.

Aksinya began to speak. The great book was opened to the correct page, but she didn’t need to look at it. She knew the words to say, knew them by heart. This was one of her favorite enchantments. She could make herself look any way she wished for a long time. The enchantment could easily last at least a week if she desired. She had done that before—tweaked her clothing and her face. She once changed the color of her hair for over a month.

Aksinya moved her hands and touched the clay and wax models she had formed. The words she spoke endued them with the clothing and characteristics she wished to place on herself and Natalya. She picked up her dagger and nicked her finger. She let a heavy drop of blood fall onto one of the wax models. Aksinya grabbed Natalya’s hand. Natalya had been holding it out to her, ready. Aksinya cleanly sliced the lady’s index finger and gently milked a drop of blood from it. It fell on the other piece of wax, clay, and cloth. When Aksinya released her hand, Natalya stared in amazement at the newly healed cut.

Aksinya lifted both wax models and placed them in the brazier. Immediately it began to pour out heavy smoke. She censed Natalya then herself. The scent of the incense was thick and cloying. It smelled of cheap perfume and age. It was heavy like the scent of an old woman. Under that was the smell was sweat and dirt. Aksinya repeated the censing and impressed the words on them both. The brazier suddenly stopped and slowly the thick smoke rolled away.

The demon uses threats this time.  He doesn't even have to force her.  Aksinya acquiesces on her own.  This is the primary teaching of resistance training: don't let your antagonizer, your torturer have easy victories.  Aksinya has given the demon an easy victory.  We will see that this a prelude to some of her resistance.  Don't forget the sewing case. 
 
I also hope you like the revelation of the way sorcery works.  This is designed in the classical understanding: words of power and items of sacrament.  In this we have a reference to the Church.  Obviously, what propels the demon and Aksinya is the world with God.  How would the sorcery work, if it was not a rejection and sin against God.  How can there be demons if there isn't God.  This is the obvious logical conclusion--Aksinya even said it once before.  We will continue to see this theme--it is the point after all.

A New Novel, Part 24 Initial Natalia

Returning to the last paragraph of the previous piece of Daemon.

Aksinya wasn’t sure all that was true, but her demon displayed an inability to act through a magic circle and some unwillingness or inability to move a cross. She lounged in the warm water. Many of her own, her mother’s, and her sister’s jewelry were crosses. Suddenly, Aksinya wondered if any of her jewelry made it into the demon’s chest. He wasn’t beyond lying—in fact, Aksinya was certain that he lied most of the time. She thought for a while longer and made a plan. The first step was to ask the demon to show her, her mother’s jewelry. The water was getting cool. Aksinya made the slightest sound in the back of her throat. Natalya knocked on the door, “Mistress, do you need me to warm your water?”


“I’m getting out.”

Natalya rushed through the door and helped Aksinya out of the tub. She put a towel around her and adroitly dried her and her hair. Natalya already had a silk dressing gown ready and a heavy robe. She dressed Aksinya in them and led her back into the bedroom. A large meal was arranged on the table in the room. Natalya seated Aksinya and served her. After a moment, Aksinya asked, “Have you eaten, Lady Natalya?”

Natalya colored at being addressed so personally by a countess, “Yes mistress, I have eaten breakfast and dinner in the kitchen.”

“Are you still hungry?”

“No, mistress.”

“Where is Asmodeus?”

“Your courtier?”

“Yes.”

“He has gone to make arrangements for you to travel.”

Aksinya glanced up from her meal, puzzled, “Where are we?”

“You were so tired last night, countess. Your courtier carried you here.”

“But where is here?”

“We are at a very fine inn on the vul. Kazinca near the railway station. Last night, you could barely stand, but after I dressed you for bed, you insisted in drawing these circles around our beds.” Natalya gave a broad smile.

“Did you sleep well?”

Natalya pressed her hands together, “I have never slept better. I was so excited that you took me into your household. My heart was so free that I couldn’t stand it. I thought I would never get to sleep, but I did.”

“You needn’t be afraid of me, Lady Natalya. I will not mistreat you.”

Natalya pressed her lips together, “Did you know?”

“I know.”

“I tried to hide it from everyone.”

“You must be cautious of Asmodeus.”

“Is he dangerous to…to women?”

Aksinya face twitched in a slight smiled, “He is dangerous. You must be cautious around him. You should tell me anything he says to you. You don’t need to worry about your virtue, but perhaps about other things.”

Natalya’s face turned into a frown, “Other things?”

“I don’t want you to worry about them, just be cautious of him. When you are with me you should be safe.”

Aksinya is beginning to take steps against Asmodeus.  We shall see if she is successful.  We will also see some delays before she can test her ideas.  The question is: how much does the demon realize?  We have some idea about how much Aksinya knows, but little about the knowledge of the demon.  We know he can't be omniscient, but the degree of his knowledge seems great.  He also seems to think out his plans to a degree that is much greater than humans can or will.

A New Novel, Part 23 Realizations

The demon has had his way.  Aksinya now has a servant.  The demon is moving and making Aksinya accommodate him.  This chapter will not have a lot of action, a little, but much begins to become clear to Aksinya about the demon and his limitations.  We also see Natalya as a character.  Don't discount her because she seems so complacent.  Remember, that practiced perfection was bought at a very high price.

Aksinya woke with a start. She touched warm and clean bedclothes. The light of the day was bright. She covered her eyes and yawned. A wide awake voice came to her, “Mistress. Mistress.”


Aksinya focused her eyes on the voice. A girl sat in a chair beside her bed. Aksinya’s thoughts came together at once, and she remembered everything from the night before, “Lady Natalya. Yes, Lady Natalya.”

The girl smiled, “Countess. Would you like to eat first or shall I draw your bath?”

“What time is it?”

“It is very late, almost two. You slept well?”

“Yes, well. I’m starving. Please draw my bath first and bring me something more substantial than breakfast.”

The girl smiled and made a beautiful low curtsy, “Yes, mistress.” She left by a door at the side.

Aksinya pushed back the covers. She wore one of her mother’s silk gowns. It was very fine, but the fabric was a little slippery and slightly uncomfortable. It brought a touch of excitement against her body and lustful thoughts to her mind. Aksinya swung her feet over the side of the bed and glanced at the floor. She didn’t remember putting on this gown, but she remembered making a magic circle around her bed and Natalya’s pallet. The circle was still intact. She noted where the lines were slightly smudged, but they were still whole. The demon wasn’t present. She wondered where he might be.

Natalya reentered the room and helped Aksinya off the bed. Aksinya was too weary and thought filled to care. The girl led her to a grand bathroom and pulled her gown over her head. She helped Aksinya into the bath. Her smile was bubbly, “Mistress, would you like me to wash you?”

Aksinya shook her head.

“I’ll get your dinner. Bathe as long as you like.”

Aksinya lounged in the hot tub. The day outside was cold and windy. She could hear the windowpanes clatter and felt the chill through the floor. She wondered again what the demon was about. Then she remembered the problem she must put her mind to--the bookstand. What made her bookstand different than the one the demon had stolen for her? She focused her thoughts on her cellar in the guesthouse. She saw the bookstand in her mind’s eye. She could have called out an enchantment to remember it exactly—she didn’t have to. She knew the small piece of furniture too well. It was made of oak and aligned at just the proper angle for reading. It had once been part of the small chapel niche in the guesthouse. She had removed it from there. Its sides and front were carved and the carvings were crosses. Orthodox crosses covered its three vertical sides.

Aksinya leaned back in the tub. The cross was rarely an impediment to magic. In fact, many magic circles and magic items incorporated crosses or cross shaped. But perhaps crosses were a problem for demons. That made sense. Her books didn’t say so explicitly, but tradition explained that demons were affected by crosses. They were said to not be able to abide them.

Aksinya wasn’t sure all that was true, but her demon displayed an inability to act through a magic circle and some unwillingness or inability to move a cross. She lounged in the warm water. Many of her own, her mother’s, and her sister’s jewelry were crosses. Suddenly, Aksinya wondered if any of her jewelry made it into the demon’s chest. He wasn’t beyond lying—in fact, Aksinya was certain that he lied most of the time. She thought for a while longer and made a plan. The first step was to ask the demon to show her, her mother’s jewelry. The water was getting cool. Aksinya made the slightest sound in the back of her throat. Natalya knocked on the door, “Mistress, do you need me to warm your water?”

Now, don't tell me you knew that crosses would be a problem for demons.  Have you ever met one.  One of the funny movie setups is the Vampire who is about to bite someone and they whip out a cross, that doesn't work..  Sure, we expect uniformity in our thoughts--that's why we had to see this evaluation step.  Aksinya is still not certain that crosses can contain the demon.  She is certain magic circles can do the job.  That is the point of bounding the demon.  That is also point of the patient revelation of his limitations.

A New Novel, Part 20 The Bookstand

In the previous scene, the demon forced Aksinya to the act of calling the girl they had observed.  Now, Aksinya begins the sorcery that will call the girl to her.  It is an act that the demon claims will show the power of Aksinya and convince the girl to follow her.

Aksinya lowered her head, “I will take it on myself. I will do as you ask.”


The petticoats and dress appeared on her body. Her shoes and stockings were suddenly on her feet and legs. Asmodeus himself laid the thick warm mink coat over her shoulders again, “Call the girl. Call her, and you may dine and sleep and experience your erotic fantasies.”

“Zatknis'! Get me my things.” She stomped to the center of the pavement.

The demon lifted his hands and opened the chest. From inside came Aksinya’s staff and her dagger. Her chalk and her candles settled at her feet. A bundle of fresh herbs and a brazier of incense followed them. One of Aksinya’s heavy books sailed through the air toward her. She caught it midair. Aksinya pulled her coat more closely around her shoulders. She glanced from the side of her eyes at the demon, “I want my bookstand.”

“Which one?”

“The one that I used when I called you.”

“I didn’t bring it.”

Aksinya whirled toward him, “Why didn’t you?”

“I didn’t.”

“What else didn’t you bring from my house?”

Asmodeus didn’t speak.

“I order you to tell me what you didn’t bring from my house.”

“Your request is neither evil nor within my desires.”

“I want a bookstand. Steal one for me.”

“Very well. I am pleased to steal for you and add this sin to your account.”

In an instant, the demon was gone. Aksinya knelt on the freezing pavement and drew a circle and a pentagram. She put up a tallow candle and lit her brazier and incense. She cut the herbs with her dagger and prepared to make a calling for the girl. For this simple spell she wouldn’t need a possession from the girl, she had seen her already. She wouldn’t even need her name. The face was clearly set in Aksinya’s mind.

After half an hour, Asmodeus returned with a fine mahogany bookstand. He laid it before Aksinya outside the circle and pentagram. She watched him carefully. She reached out and picked it up and placed it in front of her. She put her book on it and opened to the right page.

“I know what you are thinking, countess.”

“Perhaps you do and perhaps you do not. You are practiced at lying, demon. I didn’t trust you before, and I trust you even less now. Don’t bother me while I am at this work. Tell me the girl’s name.”

“You don’t need her name to do this.”

Aksinya barked, “But I want to know it, and I want to call her by name. That is a surety in this business.”

“Very well. Her name is the Lady Natalya Alexandrovna Obolenska.”

Aksinya turned a little toward the demon, “Is she the illegitimate daughter of Prince Aleksander Simonovich Andronikov?”

“Yes, very perceptive of you. How did you know?”

“Her patronymic and her family name. There was a rumor in the court about a Lady Obolenska. Does Lady Natalya know?”

“She is pleasantly unaware but suspicious. She only knows her mother abandoned her, and that she is a servant in the house of Prince Aleksander Simonovich Andronikov. She is a brilliant girl whose intellect is well above those she waits on. She doesn’t yet realize she hates them for this reason.”

“Do you know I am beginning to despise you, demon.”

“Only beginning. I though your hatred would be well grounded by now. Wrath is one of the seven deadly you know.”

Aksinya clenched her fists, “Yes, I know.” She pulled herself up to her full height, “You brought me out here to this place. Light my tallow candle. I can’t light it in this wind.”

“I cannot light anything within the magic circle, and I can’t continue to keep it lit when it is inside.”

Aksinya hid her smile from him, “Then find me something to block the wind.”

Asmodeus opened his chest and pulled out a heavy candle lantern. Aksinya recognized it from the cellar of her house. He placed the lantern outside the circle, and Aksinya retrieved it. She put her candle inside and lit it. When each thing was in its place she began to speak the Latin words.

As I mentioned and as a contributor suggested, objects in the text tie the scenes and tie the ultimate secrets Aksinya discovers about the demon.  The question I want my readers to ask themselves at this point is the same one Aksinya is asking herself--why didn't/couldn't the demon bring her bookstand?

A New Novel, Part 18 More Answers

Some more questions and comments from a reader of this blog.

Interesting discussion on 'setting the scene'. A few question some to mind:

1. How do you know when you've got 'just enough' vs too much info to set the stage and pique the reader's interest...ie, get the milieu (world) of the scene's story?
I don't.  I rely on two things: 1. does it entertain me, 2. Does it entertain my prepub readers.  I think I'm harder than anyone else on my own writing.  If I don't feel that it is entertaining, I write it over and over again until it feels right.  In terms of setting the scene, as opposed to the interest of the reader, I do know what to do for that, and I am constantly tweaking the writing to improve it.  The first is this: the scene must be set in terms of time (date and time of day), place (environment, weather, all the details), characters (appearance, clothing, equipment), and reason.  This information doesn't have to be recited right at the beginning, but it has to be put right up front and focus the reader.  It is like a stage play.  The play can't go one until the stage is set (not an empty stage here).  The scene like a stage must be set.  The writer has powerful tools that can allow the reader to see, hear, feel, smell, and taste everything that is going on in the scene.  You have written enough when your readers can experience the scene through all of their senses. 

2. Just as a novel has a whole structure, prume,so does each individual scene. So wondering, do you have a general rule of thumb which stipulates how much attention, to spend on developing a given scene?
(I'm not talking about short transitional scenes, which simply bridge, and don't require special treatment...I'm talking about substantial scenes.)
To me all scenes are substantial.  In other words, if the novel is unchanged when the scene is left out, then the scene is unnecessary and should be left out.  Even a "bridging" scene must be important.  I try to make them important or I try to fit them at the end or beginning of an important event.  So each scene theoretically gets the same attention as every other one.  That doesn't happen.  Pivotal scenes are just that, they are so important that I can't help but think about them for days until they are written.  Sometimes I find that unprogressive.  I make lots of notes and hope I don't lose the strength of the writing before the scene comes together.  The trick it to try to give as much attention to those scene leading and following a pivotal scene to ensure they are strong in themselves.

Also, I presume, you've got an objective or need for each character in a scene...and, you're trying to create rising tension..(to satisfy the need) throughout the scene's progression....
This is a great point.  Like the purpose of the scene itself in the novel, every word is carefully chosen, each bit of punctuation is placed to make the most of the entire scene.  Likewise the characters are each necessary, their entry is specific and their descriptions are critical.  I use the Arlo Guthrie method of introducing a character (and place) with at least 100 to 300 words of description.  This ensures the placement of the character and the theme.  After the place and the character is introduced the first time, you may then use defining characteristics to set the character or the scene the next time you bring them on stage.  For example, if a character has a big nose, you can easily wax eloquent about the nose in the first introduction.  You then just make the point about Lou's big nose when you bring him back again.  That allows your readers to immediately see the character in their mind again.  For a place the description might be the smell of the mold from the old furniture.  When you go back to the house, a reminder about the smell sets the scene again.  One thing I dislike in some authors is that they fail to introduce or reintroduce their characters properly.  I get confused when confronted with just a name without any description.  Writing without sufficient description is like a blank mask on your characters or an empty stage. 

3. Do you primarily use dialogue or actions of the characters to create a compelling scene? Rule of thumb, or ratio?
I try to make all the writing dialog or action narrative.  In other words, if the story isn't going through with dialog, it's because it is moving with action (showing you what is happening).  I prefer dialog.  To me, dialog is truly life.  This is how the world really runs.  Who cares what a person did. What is more compelling is when that person tells why they did it to another person--or lies about it.  That's when you begin to understand about the characters.  There is no ratio, but I find that 80 percent of my writing or more is dialog.

4. Do you give alot of thought, to the "point of attack" ...the point at which you have the character enter the scene? Is it usually at an entry point, mid point or exit point of a scene? Any rule of thumb?
Ah, these are screenplay terms.  In general, the setup for a scene is at least one character.  The other characters enter based solely on the storyline for the scene.  So, in my way of looking at scenes, I have a scene input and a scene output.  The point is the input and the output.  The stuff in between is the storyline.  That storyline must fit into the plot, and that plot must fit into the theme.  So they enter and exit just based on these points.  I'm not sure I can be more general than that.  Let me use the example of the very first chapter and scene of Daemon.  We have Aksinya conjuring a demon.  The scene is set.  Aksinya goes about her business and you have a demon.  The input of the scene is Aksinya's sorcery.  The output is the contract with the demon.  The demon appears at just the important point in the scene.  His appearance supports the storyline, plot, and theme. 

5. How much attention to you give to the "back story" or exposition? that is... elements of the character's biography that are crucial to the story developing?
Obviously, good (believable) novel & screenplays contains back story because every believable character brings a certain amount of baggage to a drama.
I want to give these details through mostly dialog with other characters.  In other words, you get it when the other characters in the novel get it.  This goes back to my point that I want my readers to know as much as the characters in the story know.  I don't like omniscient storylines.  In Daemon, at the beginning, I do give you some information about Aksinya's back story as description--that's because the reader needs some tangible info to set the scene.  Note, I don't give you anything about he demon except external description.  And all you get from that point is almost 100% external description and dialog.  Thus in dialog, you learn so much more about Aksinya.  That's the trick, every time she opens her mouth, you learn a little more about her.  Some of it is back story.  Some is mundane, but you find out what moves her soul.

6. What are some effective ways of weaving different scenes and storylines together?
Wow, this is a very hard question to answer.  The primary means is through the characters themselves.  The last time I addressed comments, there were some wonderful points about items--things.  I said watch for them in the development of the novel.  Items, like those mentioned before--we will see a bookstand becomes an item that weaves the scenes and storylines together.  A crucifix will do the same.  Aksinya's mother's dresses.  Sorcery weaves together the overall scenes and storyline.  The idea of temptation.  Like the multiple levels of the plot that I am trying to write into this novel, the multiple characters, items, and ideas provide the glue that holds the scenes and storyline together.

7. Do you have a preferred technique for revealing facts about a person...ie, props, clothing, makeup, language (accent), behavior, musing, dialogue?.
I love to use language differences to bring out compelling things about a person.  The wrapper is important to me, but not as important as the words.  When Aksinya tells the demon to "shut up," you know he has touched a nerve.  I don't have to have her say anything else.
I suspect most back story, however, is conveyed through dialogue. After all, good exposition doesn't stick out...it is presented in a believable context.
Yes, great observation.  Mostly through dialog, some through description.
(Suspect it's easy to overload the reader with too much information.)
I'm not sure that is possible with dialog.  It is certainly possible with description.  The point of dialog is that it is ultimately entertaining.  Just as we like to discuss subjects, readers like to eavesdrop on the character's discussions.  If the dialog is entertaining, the reader won't care how much information you are pumping out.  In fact, the information flow can be enormous and as long as the reader is entertained with the repartee, they won't get tired of it.  For example, in the last bit of dialog between Aksinya and the demon, I laid a bunch of heavy stuff on the reader. 

“No! I haven’t rejected Him. I believe in Him. How could I not believe—I’ve seen demons. If there are demons, there is God.” She glanced down, “I don’t trust Him. I knew He would fail me. I didn’t expect you to fail me or my own strength to fail me.”
Asmodeus picked his teeth with a claw, “I didn’t fail you—you called me too late. You failed, Countess Aksinya Andreiovna Golitsyna. I didn’t fail and that guy didn’t fail—you failed. Come, you’ve seen her. Now is the time to go.”

You have to admit, this is some really deep dodo.  The reader may or may not take the time to think about these statements.  I do believe they are entertaining in themselves, so most readers will just keep reading, entertained and yet musing about the astounding things the demon and Aksinya just said to one another.

8. Do you tend to reveal background info early in the story, but, withhold certain facts for dramatic effect. I've heard come writers say secrets are the most powerful form of back story, and whole dramas can revolve around them. Do you employ it, often?
I suspect, knowing how and when to expose details about a character's past is a real art form.
I don't call them secrets (although that is a perfect characterization of it).  As I mentioned, I don't want my readers to know more than the characters in the story.  Now, we know there are things the characters haven't shared with us--like Aksinya's real father.  You might have guessed there is an issue here.  I may not have laid enough clues.  That's what further run throughs do is allow the writer to improve the foreshadowing and the proper revelation of these points.  Indeed a secretive character might have secrets and a nonsecretive character might have secrets.  The point is that we never know all of anyone's "secrets" even if we know them well.  The same is true for characters in a novel--we don't know everything about them and, indeed, those things of importance to the plot are revealed in their proper time.  Just like the observation of the servant in the last installment.  I've tried to excite the readers about who this servant is and the proper revelation of these points.  Indeed a secretive character might have secrets and a nonsecretive character might have secrets.  The point is that we never know all of anyone's "secrets" even if we know them well.  The same is true for characters in a novel--we don't know everything about them and, indeed, those things of importance to the plot are revealed in their proper time.  Just like the observation of the servant in the last installment.  I've tried to excite the readers about who this servant might be.  I didn't give any clues at all.  The demon didn't drop hardly any.  When you finally see her, what is your response?  Relief? Fear? Wonder? Excitement?  Does it make you wonder more, like Aksinya, just who is this servant?

9. Do you employ set-ups & pay offs; like screen writers do? That is, a set up introduces a bit of action, that will become significant later on and lead to a pay-off.
Yes, big time.  I just don't refer to them as setups and pay offs.  Generally, the foreshadowing, items, characters, settings in a scene are all setups for further scenes.  Just as the dresses and the jewelry boxes mentioned in chapter two, the sorcery books and items in chapter one, the hunger, cold, and tiredness of Aksinya in chapter three everything is a setup.  Each will bring some large or small pay off.  Otherwise, what's the point of mentioning it.
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10. Do you usually close out a scene on a button? You know, something to seal off the scene with a punch....maybe, some type of narrative tool to make the scene stand out, and alone.
More screenplay terms.  Yes, I attempt to close out every scene with a specific punch.  No scene should just peter out.  They have to have some tight ending to wrap them up and push the reader into the next scene.
The true end of the last scene I gave you:
“Close your mouth, Countess Aksinya Andreiovna Golitsyna, now is the time for us to act.”

“I don’t understand you at all.”
“You will.” - there is your "button"

The one prior:
Aksinya watched him move toward the back of the house.  When he was out of sight, she sat on the chest.  After a bit, she curled up on the top of it and pulled the coat close.  Her breath came in white clouds.  She closed her eyes. - there is the "button"  She closes her eyes and that closes the scene.

Prior to that:
The streetcar came up, and they boarded.  Asmodeus paid the fare.  They rode the streetcar past the city center and out toward the west side.  Aksinya sat and Asmodeus stood.  Certainly the world changed to accommodate a nearly seven foot tall demon who carried a gigantic chest on his shoulders.  He seemed to fit on the streetcar without trouble.  The entire world suddenly seemed less solid to Aksinya than ever before. - the "button"
The end of each scene is unique.  It leaves a thought in the mind of the reader, or it closes the scene like a curtian on a stage.

That's it until tomorrow.  I'm trying to decide how to break up the next very important (pivotal) scene.  This is where Aksinya calls her servant.

A New Novel, Part 14 In Minsk

Now you get to see Asmodeus use a new technique to get Aksinya to sin.  Watch closely.  I'll start back with the rest of the paragraph.  As you remember, the demon led her to Minsk and they are now traveling in the city--they are looking for a servant for Aksinya.

The demon smiled and turned. He started out again along the side of the road. Aksinya heard a couple of snide remarks, but no one followed them or threatened her. As they went deeper into the city, Asmodeus led her to a streetcar stop. They waited there for a streetcar. Aksinya gladly sank onto the bench while the demon stood beside her. On the way, he had returned to his normal form, at least in her sight. She could not ever forget that he could change his form and perhaps hers. That made her think. “Demon.”


“Yes, countess.”

“How can I see the form you present whenever I want to?”

“Ah, I’d rather not say.”

“But I want to know. I order you to tell me.”

“There is perhaps a phrase in one of your books that would do quite well.”

Aksinya let a Latin phrase trip off her lips. Immediately she could see the demon in his current guise. “That will do satisfactorily. Thank you, demon.”

“And thank you countess. It is indeed a pleasure to see you accomplish sorcery.”

Aksinya sucked in her breath, “You tricked me.”

“Again, yes. You feel desire again too.”

Aksinya blushed and squirmed in her seat, “Not at all.”

The streetcar came up, and they boarded. Asmodeus paid the fare. They rode the streetcar past the city center and out toward the west side. Aksinya sat and Asmodeus stood. Certainly the world changed to accommodate a nearly seven foot tall demon who carried a gigantic chest on his shoulders. He seemed to fit on the streetcar without trouble. The entire world suddenly seemed less solid to Aksinya than ever before.

The trick in the writing is to constantly try to surprise you just as Aksinya is surprised.  I hope these little events sneak up on you.  Are you watching the demon closely--you know he lies, and you know his purpose is to tempt into sin.  If you keep this clear in your mind, everything he does or doesn't do will become very clear.

A New Novel, Part 11 A New Life

I hope you weren't too shocked to see Aksinya's issue.  It isn't specifically a sin, but lust drives her in many ways.  The temptation of this specific one of the seven deadly sins (they are really temptations and not sins) is extravagance specifically from Latin, luxuria or unrestrained excess. Extravagant behaviour includes the frequent purchase of luxury goods and forms of debauchery.  Aksinya doesn't necessarily lust after things or individuals, she lusts after knowledge and specifically the knowledge of sorcery.  We will see this later.  Her own desire becomes the symbol for both this luxuria and the culmination of her acts of sorcery.  The point is to give the readers symbols that relate directly to the actions of the characters.  This provides the fulcrum that moves the plot toward the theme.  This doesn't mean the storyline or the plot is an allegory, but rather that the plot becomes a vehicle for the theme through the use of these symbols.  They make the reader immediately relate back to certain characteristics that illustrate the theme within the major characters.

The last bit of chapter 2:

In the morning, the demon stood at the side of her bed. Aksinya didn’t blink, “I did not invite you into my room, demon.”

“Countess, I have your breakfast. Would you like to eat it here or in the dining room?”
Aksinya sat up, “Here, please.”
“Would you like me to draw your bath?”
“Please.”
“What would you like me to pack?”
Aksinya chewed on a crust of bread and took a sip of tea before answering, “Take all my mother’s dresses and mine. Also my sisters. Bring the china and silver and any of the fine artwork. The money is in my father’s safe and in his room. Get it all. If you know my mind, you know where all of it is.”
“I know where it all is.”
“Don’t forget my mother, sister, and my jewelry. Bring my sister’s shoes. They fit me.”
“Do you want me to take the furniture also?”
“Can you?”
“I can.”
“Then take it all—everything in the house and guesthouse. By the way, where will you put all of it?”
“That is my secret. What about your books and things…” he drew out the word.
“Put those on the top where I can get them at any time.”
“Very good, countess. When you are finished and dressed, we may leave. What clothing would you like me to put out for you?”
“My blue traveling dress the one with the puffy sleeves and the lace. I’ll wear my blue button-up shoes. The ones mother brought me from Paris. And don’t forget my blue traveling hat—the one with the feather.”
“Very good. I’m glad you are feeling better and in such good spirits. It’s amazing what giving in to a little temptation can do for you.”
Aksinya dropped her toast. She choked and bowed her head. After she got back her breath, she whispered, “That’s what I did, didn’t I.”
“Yes, splendidly. I was so proud of you.”
“I’m suddenly not so proud of myself. I’m not hungry any more.”
“Eat, countess. I’ll not be put off. When I am done with the packing, we shall depart. I have in mind to get your servant, and I have in mind to leave this house before the Party visits it this evening.”
“Will they?”
“My sources tell me they will.”
“And who are they?”
“I’ll not bore you with the details.”
“I should speak to the villagers before I go.”
“They know your family is dead. They assume you are too.”
Aksinya took a deep breath, “How did they know?”
“While you were a slug-a-bed, they came to check on your father. They found the bloodstains and the fresh graves in the plot.”
“I should have had you hide it all.”
“It wouldn’t do any good. They would find out eventually.”
“Surely they see the lights from the house. We have been burning them since, since, since that time.”
“I have given the impression that no one is here. I have kept it all still as the grave and hidden any signs of life. It is as if you were dead.”
“Yes. I see.”
“Because, you are dead to this life, countess. You start a new life today. Today, we shall leave for Austria and your family there.”
Aksinya mouthed the words, “So you can do evil there.”
“No, so we can accomplish evil there.”

The story must move out of Russia and to the west for many reasons.  There is little scope for the demon to act and too much scope for Aksinya to act (in the mind of the demon).  This shift of scene will allow the focus of the story to move--from just the demon and Aksinya.  The most important consideration is the problem the demon will have with Aksinya in Russia.  She will be much more vulnerable after she has been disconnected from her roots.  I may be revealing too much here, but I thought I might give you some insight to the purpose of the demon.
 
By the way, I've already thought of some important changes I want to make to the first chapter.  Specifically, I will add snow to the scene--this will give it more of the proper feel for the time of year, and I will be able to make some strong comparisons to the blood on the snow.

A New Novel, Part 9 Comments on Temptation plus the Reason

I have included some comments from a reader.  I will address the questions and some of the comments in italics.

From a reader:

You're novel, fascinating & original. Though, was wondering, did you get the idea of demon/human dialogue, from the CS Lewis's Screwtape Letters? Regardless, brilliant, and engaging. Betcha, when completed, and polished, it will become a best seller.  Thanks.  I do like the Screwtape letters.


Have several Q's; unfortunately, will be a few days before I can much detail ('cause, I'm swamped at work).

Though, will quickly make a few points:

1. Really like the way you're weaved the story theme, plot & character development together; especially revealing, with the dialogue between demon & the girl. Thanks!

2. Particularly liked the bath scene; like the (authentic) setting, the description (sets mood), and way the girl (mentally) assessed herself; gives the reader a a good (subtle) sense of her locus of identity, her vulnerability, etc. Precise point and this is something that will potentially be fleshed out more in the final.

3. Very interesting/clever how you discuss her sense of loss of identify, with loss of her hair...the only redeeming characteristic that (she thinks) defined her beauty, given to the demon, as surety for contract. Clear, she's mis-guided, by focusing on the external (hair), whilst the demon is focusing on the internal (acquisition of the soul). The maturity/immaturity of Aksinya is a continuing theme.

4. BTW, I also, like the way you used the 'mirror' to allow her to catch image of herself, and characterize herself. Thanks, excellent observation.

5. Brilliant how you turned the demon into a temporary domesticated helper...getting food, drawing bathwater for her. Almost lulls you into a 'false' sense of sympathy for him, domestically caring for her...though, he makes it clear, what his agenda is, etc.  That's exactly the point--we shall see how this plays out.

Must say, I was very surprised, you (the writer) were so straight forward, in having the demon directly suggest she study sorcery. I understand his motive, why, etc.
But, personally, I thought, it was a waste of a great opportunity, to further highlight the demon's cunning, and plumb the depths of the girl's character, and highlight her 1st futile (misguided, toxic) attempt to regain control her destiny, after death of her family; and horrible contract with the demon.
Kindly suggest, you consider unfolding in a more subtle extended manner; gives you a sense of the demons's cunning; perhaps, a dialogue between the girl & demon...
Say, he at the bedroom side of the door, she in the bathroom. She initiates, and engages, in dialogue with him, while concurrently pondering over her current situation, looking at her physical condition, maybe, in the mirror or bath, seeing her physical vulnerability & bruised condition again, & maybe, have a few fleeting thoughts pass through her head...highlighting her state of mind,and emotional vulnerability...maybe, have the conversation trail off....die down...than resume, different cadence, different length of dialogue,e tc.
This is an excellent observation.  I thought about doing exactly this, and in the next cut, I may put this more into play.  The reason I had the demon suggest sorcery to her is to tempt her to sorcery directly.  This will become clear somewhat in this piece, and definitely in the next.  It could perhaps be more subtle and I agree with the comments.  There is a reason for the demon's suggestion...

The point is, through the dialogue, you (the reader) gets the sense that the demon clearly senses her vulnerability, her desire to control or influence her future...so he begins embarks on a elaborate or scheming dialogue with her which culminates in him (obliquely) suggesting sorcery...not directly upfront...but, rather gets her to crave after it herself....the temptation is planted by him, but, she goes after it....so, it seems like her idea, when really it's an infection from him.. Betcha it would add an interesting dimension, to the character development, and story plot.

6. Liked the way, you had the girl say a prayer, for the food brought....some subtle hint of hope, for redemption of her soul. Yes, maybe the prayer was just an unconscious habit, but, it most certainly was picked up by the demon, irritated him, and he tried to invalidate & smother it with condemnation..gives you a great clue, on the condition of her soul...though not innocent, most certainly redeemable... Again a great observation.

Well, that's a few points of feedback on your latest chapter..

But big picture, probably the two most fascinating themes, I've seen woven into your story, aside from the original 'contract with the demon', was your unfolding of the concept of the 'bounding of the demon', and, your unfolding of the idea of 'choice & consequence' that plays out, with the girl making a deliberate choice of the injury she will gets, through her interaction with the demon....but, she doesn't fully realize the ramifications, of either choice, until afterwards.  We will see the demon has more bounds.

The following dialogue was particularly noteworthy:
"You trusted your body and soul to me—you have aligned yourself to a demon. Your soul was harmed, but not your body. I can protect your body, but I can’t protect your soul. You will heal—that is the way with humans.”

As well as the following:
"It already has marked your soul. Such things become like the lustful desires you already know, they are difficult to purge from your heart and mind once they are experienced.”

Alot of truth, to both; especially the second. Ah, the delights of sin are good for a season, but the consequences, can be fore a lifetime, or eternity.
Reminds me of that verse:
"What does it profit a man, if he gains the whole world, but looses his soul." This in some measure is the theme of the novel.

Here is the next installment.  It doesn't get to the full endpoint of the temptation, but it moves toward it and gets to the next point--the purpose of the demon and the purpose he wishes for her.  Additionally, this tells you why he mentioned sorcery while she was in the bath.
“Now, countess, let us plan what you should do. The first is that you cannot stay here.”

“I have nowhere else to go.”
“Foolish lady, we will soon run out of food to feed you and heat to sustain your puny body.”
“You can provide me all these things…”
“At the expense of your soul.”
“I thought you desired that.”
“And at the expense of my reputation. I told you, I do not wish to become your domestic.”
Aksinya laughed, “You already are.”
“I have pride, that is one of the seven deadly sins, you know.”
“So, if you are my domestic it hurts your pride?” Aksinya continued to chuckle.
“This is not funny. I am Asmodeus. I will not continue this way.”
“What can you do to stop it?”
“I will protect you and I will fulfill our contract, but I can make it exquisitely painful for you to continue in this manner.”
Aksinya’s brow rose, “How could you do that. What suffering could you bring me that I haven’t already experienced?”
“Your people and friends will be pursued by the Bolsheviks. I can bring great suffering to them—that is my purpose.”
Aksinya let her cup fall to the saucer, “You wouldn’t dare. I would simply order you to…”
“I told you. I can’t stop this revolution, and I don’t want to stop it. The lives of your friends and your people are nothing to me. You can order all you wish, but I will protect only you. My purpose, otherwise, is evil. You know this.”
“I understand this,” Aksinya ran her fingers through her short hair. She regretted that as soon as she did it. It reminded her of everything she had done already. Meekly, she whispered, “Then what do you wish me to do.”
“First, I must find you a servant.”
“If so, it must be someone you will not harm.”
Asmodeus grinned, “I have the perfect servant in mind.”
“Then what?”
“I told you, you must continue to study sorcery. To do that, you need a safe place to live and work.”
Aksinya mumbled into her teacup, “Where is such a place?”
“There are many such places. I know your mind so I know you have relatives beyond the boarders of this country. They will be willing to take you in and give you leave to live as you wish.”
“You want me to travel?”
“I wish to travel too. There are many places in the world that need more evil. Let us seek such a place.”
“So you can make it like this one?”
“That would not be so safe for you. I’ll settle for a balance of evil as long as you participate in it.”
“I will not do such a thing.”
“You can’t help yourself.”
“Where do you want to take me?”
“In Austria, you have family and acquaintances who will even accept an ugly countess. They hold the aristocracy in honor there and that can become a place for great evil. There is also Germany, but you don’t have any direct relations, and they don’t speak French.”
“What has that got to do with anything?”
“You speak French very well, countess. I must train you up to be an appropriate vessel for evil. You must be able to speak and interact with the people to gain their trust.”
“So you can enact your evil?”
“And you yours. You can improve your German in Austria. I see great things ahead for you there.”
“When do you plan to take this trip, and how do expect to travel with revolution all around us.”
“I could simply carry you.”
“At the expense of my soul.”
“That hasn’t bothered you much in the past, but I intend you to travel by normal means. There is the problem of the servant and of these domestic, human considerations. I don’t want to bother with all your female issues either. I have only had male masters before. They were never such a trial to me.”
Aksinya sputtered, “What if I refuse to go?”
“I told you. I will cause you suffering beyond that which you can bring to me.”
“I cause you to suffer?”
“Your human issues are painful to me. Plus your simple goodness nauseates me.”
“Do I have simple goodness? Do I have any virtue left?”
“Yes, but I will seek to expunge that from you. In time, I shall.”
“By threats and coercion?”
“You will seek evil on your own. I will simply focus your actions so they may provide the most evil. That is my purpose. Now, you will be able to travel tomorrow.”
“How do you know that?”
“You will attempt some healing sorcery tonight. Since I put the thought in your mind, you have thought continually about it. You are already eyeing your books and wondering how you can accomplish it without my knowing. When the desire and the pain becomes uncontrollable in you, you will do it.”
“I am not in pain right now.”
“You are lying.”
“I am lying.”
“You are holding it back well, but since you are clean and fed and have emptied your bladder, the pain has been growing in your legs and thighs. You wish there were something to take care of that pain. You wish me to bring you wine and drugs.”
“I could order you.”
“I would not help you. It would only deaden the pain. I wish you to suffer. That will bring you to compromise yourself. I protect you, I don’t cater to your every whim. Not if they don’t lead to evil. That’s the point, after all.”
“I’ve heard enough. Leave me.”
“Very well. I shall wait outside your room. If you require my help, just call my name. I can aid your sorcery.”
“Get out.”
The demon bowed. He backed to the door and stepped out.
Aksinya stared to throw her cup at him, then thought better of that and pitched an empty dish at him. It broke against the door with a satisfactory crash.

There is indeed more that can be done with subtlety.  We will find out the demon is both subtle and direct.  This is the point of temptation--it is always subtle and direct.

A New Novel, Part 8 More Temptation

If you haven't figured this out, I am slowly feeding you the first cut of this novel, Daemon (working title).  I'm doing it on a whim because in the future, the writing will improve, and it likely won't be published for a few years anyway.  I thought it would be a great project to actually show you how I write a novel.  This way you will get an inside view to how one author actually writes a novel and you will get to see my creative process at close range.  If this isn't interesting to you, the writing should be.  I aim for fun and exciting novels.  I do hope you will enjoy these postings for one or the other reason.  You also get a free read.  I plan for a 100K word novel, so you will have a lot to sink your teeth into.  Right now, I have the whole novel blocked out in scenes in my mind and my little notebook.  My notes are what I write to.  When I am thinking about the novel, I jot down the ideas for the scenes and pithy pieces of conversation between the characters.  These notes provide a broad outline for the writing of the novel.  I don't detail every bit of every scene, and I don't specify every scene, I just have broad notes to guide the writing.  Many transition scenes must be added into the novel to move to the appropriate large and important scenes, but that doesn't make the transition scenes of any less importance or entertainment value.

To catch you up a little, Aksinya called and contracted the demon Asmodeus.  She did it to save her family from the Bolsheviks during the Russian Revolution.  She was too late and her family was murdered.  She was injured through her interaction with the demon and is demoralized by her failure.  The demon has become her domestic for the moment and drew her a bath.  She has problems walking now because her legs were injured.

Aksinya went to the bath. By the way, the date is November 1918 and the place is a Russian country estate.  They do not have indoor plumbing.  They do have tubs and baths.

The tub was high and filled with hot water. She gazed longingly at it and made her way to the side. She felt it to make certain it wasn’t too hot and with the staff climbed over the side and into the water. This was marvelous. For a moment, she felt better than she had in what seemed a long long time. That’s when hunger began to gnaw at her. She was so upset and uncomfortable before she hadn’t noticed it. Now her hunger took her, and like she usually did when she was uncomfortable, she sought something to take her attention away.


Aksinya examined her body. She was undeveloped. That was so obvious in the bath. Her legs and thighs were still bruised, but they were healing. The black and blue marks on her skin were turning an ugly brown. They were going away. She moved her legs. In the warm water they moved more easily than before. She touched herself. They were still painful, but it was less than before. She moved her hands up her torso. Her breasts were nothing like her mother’s or her sister’s. She lingered there for a moment then moved them more quickly before those thoughts came again and touched her face. It wasn’t beautiful. The demon was right. She wasn’t even pretty. Her mother said in time she would gain a degree of beauty, but Aksinya knew that was pity. She was afraid to look at herself after she had given most of her hair to the demon. It was short now and fell to her ears. It was likely ugly as her face now. It had been her only redeeming characteristic before she cut it off. Now she could feel the uneven ends, and she wondered if it would ever grow out again—she had given it to the demon, after all. Finally, she called out, “Asmodeus.”
His voice came from just outside the door, “Yes, countess.”
“Why do you call me that?”
“Because it is true. Your family is dead, you are the countess now.”
“I don’t like you to call me that.”
“Then I shall continue to use it.”
She gritted her teeth, “Why did my legs become so injured when you took me here?”
“I thought I explained that to you before.”
“I didn’t understand it then. Give the a better explanation.”
“Any explanation or the truth?”
“Tell me the truth you horrible creature.”
Asmodeus laughed, “When you took my hand, you reached out to me. I carried you through stone and earth and then we traveled through the cosmos to arrive at the front of your house. Since you didn’t trust your body and soul to me, your body endured that travel. What did you think would happen if you went through stone and earth and the cosmos?”
“But when you carried me, I wasn’t injured.”
“You trusted your body and soul to me—you have aligned yourself to a demon. Your soul was harmed, but not your body. I can protect your body, but I can’t protect your soul. You will heal—that is the way with humans.”
Aksinya thought a bit more.
Asmodeus voice boomed from behind the door again, “You are hungry. You will not heal or survive long without sustenance.”
“I can’t prepare food for myself. I can barely get around my own room.”
“Then I must prepare it for you. I did not agree to become your domestic. We must fix this situation before we continue too far.”
Aksinya laughed at him, “How do you propose to do that demon?”
“I must find you a servant to take care of your needs. Obviously, you don’t want me to have to dress and undress you. You are as vain as any woman. I grow weary with taking care of these human needs.”
Aksinya laughed again, “For now get me some food and place it in my room.”
Asmodeus growled, but Aksinya heard him move in her room.
In a while, the bath became cool. Aksinya let the water out and picked up her staff. She levered herself out of the deep tub and stood shakily on the cold floor. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and turned her head. She looked pale and her face was pinched. It showed her pain and looked haggard. Her hair was as ugly as everything else.
She toweled herself off as well as she could and wrapped it tightly around her body. Then she unlocked the door and peeked into her room. The demon had not returned yet. She took another nightgown from her wardrobe. This was her winter gown. It was wool. She put it on and though scratchy after the smooth cotton of her other one, she felt much better and finally clean.
She got back into bed and laid the staff next to her.
Asmodeus came through the door with a service in his hands. He put the tray in front of her on the bed. It held a hot pot of tea. He poured it for her and lifted the covers from the dishes. The smell of the food overwhelmed her senses. He had made her an omelet and bread. Everything was fresh. She prayed and crossed herself.
The demon made a depreciating sound, “To bless that which was made with a curse is perhaps the act of a fool.”
Aksinya ignored his comment and began to eat.
She ate almost everything he brought her. Then she settled back on her pillows, “Thank you demon. I feel much better.”
“You needn’t thank me, you gave up part of the virtue of your soul and your life to gain that repast.”
“I understand that, but I needed to eat.”
“These human needs…”
“Don’t you eat?”
“Never. I have no need. I have no human needs and no human desires. My only desire comes from our contract and from my desire to do evil.”
“It is not evil to prepare good food or to take care of my needs.”
“It is evil for you to use your soul and life to get them.”
She looked over her cup, “Perhaps.”
“Now,” Asmodeus sneered, “since your human needs are assuaged, it is time to plan. What do you intend to do?”
“I only thought to save my family. Now, I don’t know what to do. You tell me, you can’t or will not help me fight the Bolsheviks. You tell me, you won’t help me fight this revolution…”
“I like revolutions. The evil it brings to the world is pleasant to me.”
“I have no other plans.”
“You must survive. Whether you accomplish the desires of your heart are beyond my understanding or care, but for our contract, you must survive.”
“The desires of my heart…I had but one desire and that is dust and ashes.”
“Then perhaps you will meet my desires.”
Aksinya’s lip curled up, “Your desires are the least of my concern.”
“But your desires are mine. Especially those that are evil and that continue to abrade your soul.”
Aksinya glowered at him, “What would that be?”
“I wish you to continue with your study of sorcery. That is certainly evil.”
“I have no purpose for it anymore.”
“You put years of study into it, and you are very adept. The fact you called and contracted me are the evidence of that.”
“I did not intend to give it up.”
“I thought so. It already has marked your soul. Such things become like the lustful desires you already know, they are difficult to purge from your heart and mind once they are experienced.”
“Shut up! You may know my mind, but you needn’t say such embarrassing things.”
“It is like all human desires. It is what makes you human,” his lip curled up over his fangs. “Humans are so disgusting.”
Aksinya sipped her tea and ignored him.

So you can see the point of the demon's temptation.  He wishes to encourage her use of sorcery, of magic.  He sees this as a simple means to tempt her.  We shall see that this is his primary means to get her to sin.  If you remember, demons lie, you will be able to gain an understanding of how the demon works his own magic of temptation.  His other powers of persuasion will become evident later.  You may have already noted them.  He is playing good cop/bad cop for here right now.  He provides her needs while encouraging her to his own ends.  Note his desire to plan for her future.  He wishes to plan for the purpose of increasing the evil she will do.  This is very important.  Another point of interest is the purpose of evil.  The demon specifically told her that the evil of the revolution was pleasant to him.  The impression is that there is enough evil to go around in Russia right now.  The demon sees more purpose in Aksinya moving from the evil of Russia to another venue.  Will will soon see where and what that new venue is.