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Saturday, January 8, 2011

A New Novel, Part 97 Every Evening, a Transition and a Kicker

I set up the situation of Aksinya and Natalya traveling to Aksinya's house for at least two nights.  Asmodeus took them the first time, and the second, they went to escape Sister Margarethe.  What I want to do now is end this chapter with the impression that the two ladies are going to the house daily.  Aksinya, at first, was reluctant.  Now she is encouraged.  Note, all of this was at the demon's suggestion.  Although we know Aksinya is trying to fight the demon, she is like putty in his hands.  The setup of the circumstances around Aksinya are detailed and unexpected.  This short piece is the end of chapter 8.  It has a transition and a kicker.  The entire situation is set up for the next chapter.  Chapter 9 is a pivotal chapter where we see the culmination of the setup begun from the entry into Wien.

Each evening after the dormitory was quiet, Aksinya opened the lock at the back door. She cast a spell to prevent observation. Then she led Natalya out of the dormitory and across the street to her house. The place was comfortable to Aksinya. It was filled with her family’s ancient possessions. She could make magic circles to protect herself and Natalya there. She could work the sorcery she found in her new book there. She could study whatever she wished. She could sleep in her own bed whenever she wished. She could work in very comfortable conditions in a place that seemed completely familiar to her. She literally had her own place.

As an excuse, Aksinya helped Natalya with her studies, and sometimes she worked on her own studies. She taught Natalya a little about Latin, but she was very slow and deliberate about it. She never wanted to teach Natalya anything about sorcery, but she didn’t want to bring on the attention of the demon or the ire of Natalya, so she taught her just a little. Enough to give the appearance of teaching, but nothing that had any real meaning. Aksinya reasoned the Latin itself could be helpful to Natalya anyway.

They didn’t see the demon the entire time.

Before the night was over, they returned to the dormitory and went back to bed. No one was the wiser, so they thought.

Note the language.  Each evening... Aksinya (used sorcery) to open the lock.  She additionally cast another spell to hide Natalya and her movements.  Aksinya has moved from resisting the demon to adding to her sorcery to hide her secretive actions.  Further, look at the description of what Aksinya does in her house.  Her temptation of luxuria is satisfied by her expensive possessions.  You know that includes her dresses, but more than that she has her sorcery books and implements.  She can do as she likes.  She can practice sorcery.  The new book has encouraged her interest in sorcery--just as the demon planned.  If you look carefully at the language I use, each item was what Asmodeus used to tempt Aksinya.  She is following the demon's purpose.  Even more, she is practicing sorcery--that was the whole reason the demon brought her to Wien.  Did you notice this before I told you?  If you did, I communicated it well.  If you didn't then I really achieved my goal as a writer.  I wanted you, like Aksinya to miss the fact that she was directly acting as the demon called her to act.  The end of the paragraph: She literally had her own place.

That isn't all.  As an excuse--Aksinya's excuse is that she is helping Natalya.  She is teaching Natalya sorcery.  This is just the thing Aksinya didn't wish to do.  She is doing it to placate Natalya and the demon.  Though Aksinya has convinced herself that her teaching has little meaning, she is teaching the rudiments--in Latin to Natalya. 

Then the kicker--all chapters must (should) end with a kicker.  Here is the kicker.  First, they didn't see the demon--the reason is that Aksinya is following the demon's instructions (almost).  She isn't following all of the demon's instructions.  Oh my, what might the demon do?  Second, the final sentence is the kicker for the chapter end.  It wraps up everything and sets the tone for the beginning of the next chapter.  The driver into it is the completion of this transition scene.  The scene began with the girls going to Aksinya's house.  The end of the scene is that Before the night was over... and the kicker: No one was the wiser, so they thought.  The point here is the idea that someone does know they are sneaking out of the dormitory.  You want to make a guess who is watching.  The trick is that Aksinya and Natalya don't suspect anything.

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